Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
ZM's Bree and Clint podcast.
It's our radio show, but wrapped up in a neat little package just for you. It's ZM's Bree and Clint podcast. ZM's Bree and Clint, thanks to KFC. Go! ZM's Bree and Clint. G'day, everybody. It's Bree and Clint. Just looking at the deal or reveal cases. How many have we opened, Bree? Five? One, two, three, four. Five. Down the bottom. Ah, yes, five. So there's 15 cases left.
Lucky I'm not the banker. 15 cases and one of them's got five grand in it. I'm feeling 12 or 13. My eye keeps getting drawn to the 12. Yeah, the 12 for me is looking sexy. If it's not 12, it's 16, which is directly below it. That's what my woman's intuition is telling me. I'll take 12 and you take 16 because I'll be on top, you'll be on the bottom. Deal.
Okay.
Wait, what? We're also playing Treasure of the Island today. Another chance to either go in the draw to go to Rarotonga or score yourself some free money, baby. That's at 5 o'clock. So deal or reveal for Treasure of the Island 5 and you can steal Claudia's five sauce tickets at 4.30. Gosh, it's jam-packed. She is... Absolutely full to the brim.
Also, we're going to kick it off with Tradie versus Lady. You guys know the drill. $50. If you want to win it, you've got to call to play now. 0800-DIAL-ZM. If the Tradies win every day for the rest of the week, they'll draw level. They've been doing well. Yeah. They've been on the comeback trail. Yeah. Can they finish it off this week and level the scores? Let's do it. Play ZM's Bree and Clint.
It's time for a fresh round of Tradie versus Lady. This is the main event. Tradie versus Lady. Alright guys, let's go. The tradies and the ladies, we do keep score because what's the point if you don't keep score? Yeah, we're not playing for participation certificates, you dummy. Not everyone wins. The tradies have won 33 times for the year. The ladies have won 36.
Winner crowned at the end of the year, so plenty of water to go under the bridge yet. Our lady is calling us from the home of the big cow, Morrinsville. She's 39 and she's originally from England. Welcome to the show, Laura. Well, hello there, Laura. Hi. Whereabouts in England are you from? Up north, Sunderland. Sunderland. Oh, yes, lovely. Any parallels between Sunderland and Morrinsville?
Sunderland and... Not really. No similarities? No. They got cows in Sunderland? Not really. No? So no comparison? No, nothing. All right. Big city. Laura from Sunderland, you're taking on our tradie from Taranaki. He's 20 and his nickname is Sausage Tits. Welcome to the show, Oliver. Wait a second. You got a shout out on our show yesterday, Oliver.
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Chapter 2: What experiences have listeners had with being too old to start something?
Oh, I'm like a... I'm really bad for being a spontaneous person. Drive my partner insane. But I did move to New Zealand on a whim. What? Wait, you moved to New Zealand? Like your whole life. Yeah. I was bored one day on my lunch break back in the UK. That's a good reason. And I started looking at jobs in New Zealand. And then I got a job. And I was like, oh. Better go. Wow.
I should probably start up the rest of it then. I was bored on my lunch break one day, so I moved to New Zealand. That's a great start of a story. How old were you, Ellie, when you did this? I was 20 at the time. That's incredible. Okay, and anything else? Any other spontaneous stories that jump out at you? I have a thing for bringing home dogs without asking my partner. Oh, no. How many dogs?
I think I've done maybe four or five. Wow. Ellie, you're a nightmare.
Yeah.
Yes, it's a dog. You can't say no to a dog. I mean, you also can't say that life with you would ever be boring. Well, this is very true. You know? Exactly, exactly. Be a good time. Thanks, Ali. Great story. Someone said, my parents, once every few months, decide to go and get McFlurries late at night, just as we're about to go to bed. Best feeling ever. That is fun. So good.
Especially for a kid, you'd be like, what? This is the best. And now pyjamas? This might be my favourite text of the whole lot. We're talking about times you were spontaneous. It says, a mate and I got our ta-tas pierced on our lunch break one day. Hell yeah, you did. Should we go get our nips pierced? Yeah, let's do it. I think this is the bad kind of spontaneous.
Someone said, my hubby, oh no, it's both of them. My hubby and I, I thought it was just him, so this is fine. My hubby and I went out drinking until 2am and then decided two things, to fly to Mexico at 6am. What? We went home and packed, managed to grab the passport and also decided that same night to move to the Caribbean. Oh no. This sounds like the blind leading the blind here.
Blind drunk leading the blind drunk. Exactly. Yeah. Someone said, my friends and I were out clubbing in India one night and we spontaneously decided to do a half marathon the following morning. We got up at 4am and had to be out of the house at 5am for the half marathon. We weren't able to start until half an hour after they had started because they were trying to find us registration packs.
That's wild. My mind just can't deal with that. I'm like, but you're already dehydrated and you're in India and now you're going to run a half marathon? I do feel like I'm a superwoman though after I've had a few drinks. You know when you walk home and you're like, oh. Is it like, you know how they say if you fall when you're drunk, you might get less injured because you're all sort of relaxed?
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Chapter 3: What spontaneous thing did Clint do recently?
That's really hard. That's hard, and I can hear that you're still angry and upset as well. And you should be. Yeah, yeah. Of course, you should be. It's 30 years. We asked what broke up the best friendship. That's rough. Sometimes it's not yours or their fault, it turns out. Listen to this text. It says, What? Mum told me when I finished high school.
Oh, that is... That's mum getting in the way there. Mum, yeah. Meddling. It's a mum meddling. But mum's like, well, it worked. What about this? Best mate of 20 plus years cheated on another good friend of mine on my couch under my roof. When called out, they denied it. Truth all came out nine months later. Someone said my best friend of over 30 years and her husband got a bit handsy with me.
Needless to say, she believed him, not me. I still grieve that friendship to this day. Another 30 year best friendship. Yeah. Gone, down the drain. What about this? My best friend of many years was my sounding board whilst I started an online business. I talked to her about products, plans, goals, the whole lot.
After a few months of the business doing well, she copied everything I did and told me it was just healthy competition. Our friendship ended over it. And so it should. What a snake. My mum broke up with her best friend of 33 years because she started seeing my father the minute that my mum left him. Whoa. Whoa. Which makes you question everything. You'd go, were you always keen on him?
That's what you would think. Were you guys doing stuff that I wasn't aware of? You would go back over every single memory or every single little thing and just be like, yeah, what was going on? Someone said my cousin's best friend slept with her husband. My cousin's best friend slept with her husband. So two best friends? My cousin, yeah.
And this best friend slept with this best friend's husband behind her back. Oh, yeah. Tale as long as time. Yeah. Every time I did something, within two weeks, my best friend had done it too. So when I got pregnant, I just knew soon she was going to be pregnant too. Sure enough. That's a hard one. But why does your friendship break up over that? Yeah. It's weird.
Like, was it a case of the energy? She was just always trying to one-up you. Yeah. Maybe that's how you felt and you'd had enough of that energy. I don't know. What about this? It says, my ex-best friend was a snake. I sent her my partner's number to send a text for me because my phone died and then she ran away with her. So what? You've said, hey, can you send my partner a message?
So you send the text from their phone. Yeah. And then in secret, she starts texting. Yeah, yeah. That's not what I wanted you to do. Slimy. I was de-bridesmaided from my best friend's wedding because she said we were now in different stages of life. Bitch, please. That would really rile me up. De-bridesmaiding someone is major. Yeah. And I reckon there's probably no coming back from that. Yeah.
What about this? This story is crazy. It says my best friend from high school catfished me for like two years. And then when I went to uni, she broke up with me because I didn't match her prison boyfriend drug taking lifestyle. Wow. That sounds like an episode of like. We're just listening to Jerry Springer stories now, aren't we? Yeah. Yeah. What about this? Here's another Jerry Springer story.
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Chapter 4: How do spontaneous decisions impact life experiences?
I played with your heart. Britters.
What do you think about vintage Britney Spears, Anita?
You know, that's my favourite. My daughter's favourite at the moment. She's listening to Britney all the time. No way. What are the chances? Good taste.
Well, that's going to heavily influence my vote as I throw my weight behind that song there to win birthday banger. I think I've got to go with Tim McGraw and Nelly. Oh, controversial. I had that third. Did you? Yeah. There you go. Claudia, down to you. You can put Ricky Martin back in the mix if you like. You have the power.
These are all such good songs. Yes, they are. They're honestly all sitting at number one. I'm going to do what I want. I want Ricky Martin. Damn. Look out. I want to see Alan shake his bonbons.
Nah, I respect that. Hey, great song. Not mad about it. Alan, you've just won Birthday Banger. Congratulations. Thank you so much, guys. Oh, get it, Alan. From 1999, here's Ricky Martin on ZM. ZM's Brandon Clint. Ricky Martin on ZM with Brianne Clint. It's a birthday banger for Ellen from the year 1999. Pop quiz, hot shot. How old's Ricky Martin? He's ageing backwards, so it's a tough one.
He looks like he's 35. Yeah. But I think Ricky Martin would actually be 50. 54. Shit, he looks amazing. Yeah. God, we need to infiltrate the gays. and ask them. Oh yeah, what's your secret? What are all the lotions and potions that you're putting on your faces? ZM's Brie and Clint podcast. Our next guest, Brie, roasted us to a crisp on Friday.
I actually can't believe we've invited this prick back into the studio. Yeah, look, two wrongs don't make a right, which is why we've invited him back into the studio. I'm nervous. He's performing in the New Zealand International Comedy Festival. His show is called James Muster. Pick yourself up and get back in that saddle, girlfriend. Welcome to the show, James Muster Pack. Thank you so much.
Clint wasn't lying. That is the actual name of the show. Yes. Actually, it's James must have pricked yourself up. Yeah. Last minute change. It starts tonight, doesn't it? Yes. Yeah. How nervous are you feeling? Do you get really nervous because you put a lot of time and effort into these comedy shows for the festival? Mm-hmm.
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