Abby Wambach

What has that plate done for me?

Do I want that plate in my life before I take it on?

And that is just not even a thing that used to be part of my life.

So for me, the control...

even starts earlier, it's like, do I want that in my life?

And the other part of it is also that Audre Lorde quote, that's you pay attention to the present you're constructing, it should look a lot like the future you're dreaming, is that I am trying to really condense

the window between what I say I want and hope for my future self and what I say I will take on for my present self.

Those two things together have allowed me a little more breathing room because the control has to do with, you've got to maintain a really, really lot of control if you're holding up

the, you know, a platter full of precious dishes.

Like, and then of course you're mad that no one sees you.

And of course you're mad that no one's helping you.

And you gotta really figure out

how many plates are really yours up there.

And if not, put them on someone else's fucking platter.

That belongs to you.

That's yours to control.

That's not mine.

And then like the new ones that come on, like really be careful what you put on there.

And it's lighter and you have to exercise less control when there's less to hold.

Yes.