Adam Lane Smith

Attraction is deeply unconscious, but we can make it conscious.

We can learn from it.

We can understand what we're doing and why, and we can actually shape and reshape our attraction.

Most of the clients that come into me

they are attracted to the wrong partners.

They're attracted to people who are avoidant.

She's anxiously attached.

She feels like she's worthless.

She finds a man who treats her like she's worthless and then sets out on a life journey to prove him wrong and make him turn it around.

And she will spend the next 40 years miserable, hoping that he will eventually say, yes, okay, you're worth it.

Because she's got to prove dad wrong through this guy.

That's a big part of the process.

But you can turn that.

You can shift that.

First, you have to be understanding why you're attracted to the people you are and what it is that's doing it.

A little bit.

The way that we learned to interact with our mother.

The way we learned to interact with our father.

The way that you learned to interact with your mother is probably the way you learned to interact with your fiancé.

That's how you interact with women.