Anna Runkle
speaker
240 appearances
7 recordings
2 series
first heard May 2025
last heard 19 Nov
Anna Runkle’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 6 in all, peaking in Nov 2025 with 5.
Appearances
They really spoke to me. And I wanted to go back in time and be in her family, not mine. And And I would think about her all the time. And then I would buy clothes at thrift stores and I didn't know how to sew. I was like 10, you know, so I would staple together fabric. And I bought these used ice skates and I unscrewed the blades and I would walk around in ice skates.
They have no flexibility in the soles. And I would go to school in these stapled dresses and ice skate shoes and a bonnet. Yeah. And everybody just tolerated me as some weird kid. But I was in her world. And I was just really committed. I don't want dinner. I'm going to go make a fire outside and heat my food up on the fire in the backyard. And my parents let me do it. They were hippies.
So they let me do it. So I was sort of already in these other worlds. And I had an imaginary horse. And horses for me were like, you can go where you want to go. You can just like get on your horse and ride where you want to go. And you're not like stuck. My family moved from a commune in Berkeley to this like dumpy little thing in Tucson, Arizona during the Vietnam War. And it was 110 degrees.
And I needed a horse to get out of there. I was so stuck. And so these were my ways of escaping. And so I talked to a lot of people and limerence seems to begin in childhood with these fantasies and this ability to transport yourself. But I've also heard now from people, and this is not something that I've had myself, but they get limerent like over teacher figures, right?
There's women who are not gay, but they become completely obsessed with a woman a generation older. And they're telling me this, and I'm always like, I hope you don't mean me. But that's what they do. I've received letters that are really deep and complex and puzzling about it. And the way the mother figure seems to... seems to be getting something out of it too.
And the whole relationship usually explodes. There's something really unstable about it, but they come together like, yeah, there's a fit there with it. And it's really common. I've seen that.
So I say treat it as heroin. You can't just be friends. If you can be friends, be friends. If you can just get over it, get over it. But if you could do that, you would have done it by now. And so if you're suffering still, it's time to cut ties. So I get a lot of pushback on my channel from people who go, well, that's not fair. You know, she's obsessed with this guy, but he flirted with her.
He gave her reason to hope he should leave the job. It's like, he's not writing me a letter. He's fine. She's the one who's like losing her happiness over this. So, so I recommend leave the job, stop being in contact with the person around whom you can't be yourself. You can't think about anything else.
And you can't progress as a person to where you're having a happy relationship and, you know, a happy life and fulfilled and what you want to do. And so first you cut contact. Then you have to cut off the talking about it and thinking about it. And people are like, I can't stop thinking about it. I'm like, you can. Just like a person who does heroin needs to stop thinking about it.
And the intrusive thoughts will come, but you have to remind yourself. And you're going to need friends who will support you. You're going to say, sorry, I'm just like thinking about how great it would be if that boat trip we're taking, if he would come. And they can say, okay, hold on. This is going to be really good. I'm going to be with you. This is going to be fun.
And hey, what are you going to wear? And let's go get something really nice to eat on the boat. And friends who help you come back to present time. You need help. It's very hard to fix yourself all by yourself. And you can do a certain amount.
and then you have to you have to um sometimes like one thing i had to do is get all the sad songs off my my it was an ipod at the time but i had all these songs about unrequited love like half of all songs are about that so i just took them all off and i only had songs about other things about happy things or neutral things or you know but not just um
yeah, there's like certain artists who like, that's their specialty is how sad that you did that to me. And you know, it was true love. So I just was like, I'm not going to entertain this energy anymore. I'm going to stop.
And, um, have you ever had a friend who was limerent and they just yammer on and on and they, you feel sometimes you can, you feel like you're like their, their conversational equivalent of a sex doll or something where they just want to talk about this other person. Yeah. And they're like, and then he did this thing and it was so funny.
And then, you know, we went over to the snack bar and we got potato chips and it was so cute the way he ate them. And then he said, and then I said, and it's like you're using somebody else. You're trying to co-opt their attention so that you can feed yourself the dope. And so your friends should not put up with it. They should say, I don't want to hear about it.
I know this is, you told me this is an unhealthy thing. I don't want to hear about it. This is like somebody just telling you how great drugs are, you know, or how great running in front of cars is. It's not great. I don't want to hear about it. It's disturbing, actually. And so we can be kind to people, but we need to stop.
And I just think a lot of the solutions out there and the reason I always had to find my own way to heal from my own trauma wounds, including this one, it didn't help me. It didn't help me to do conventional things. I had to be a real stoic about it.
And a woman came along, the woman who showed me the techniques that I teach and re-regulated that are like the thing that I've done for 30 years to keep moving. You can move your difficult thoughts and feelings out of your mind, get them on paper, and release them twice a day faithfully or more. Follow with a restful meditation and allow your mind to recompose.
And if you're steady with this, you come back to present time. You come back to reality. And reality is great. Reality is the only place you ever get loved. It's the only place. So it's a beautiful place to come. And you got to get out of the dream.
They can come to crappychildhoodfairy.com, the website or the YouTube channel by the name of Crappy Childhood Fairy. And the book is called Reregulated.
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