Ben Kissel
👤 SpeakerAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
I've smelled the breath of people with a rotten tooth or two, and that's bad.
This was a new level of horror.
That's a part of it, dude.
If you don't think that the man whose own hole and gullet is a sarlacc of such power, of such pure American fortitude, you don't think it's going to give off some exhaust?
You just might need to look into that because that could be a gut issue.
But Joey Chestnut, still, we know you're killing yourself early for us.
When you die early, I swear I'm going to be at your funeral saluting your perfectly preserved nitrate-ridden corpse.
And I can't wait to be there because that's going to be the real 250th celebration because your martyrdom is what will allow...
Please be the new Jesus Christ, Joey Chestnut.
It kind of is to fat people everywhere.