Ben Pester

speaker

327 appearances 1 recordings 1 series first heard Jul 2026 last heard 4 Jul

Ben Pester’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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recordings per month · last 12 months

Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Jul 2026 with 1.

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London Review Bookshop Podcast · Claire-Louise Bennett & Ben Pester: Magic & Mechanics · 4 Jul 2026 podcast

I wanted to burn the school down, which when I said it out loud in the kitchen to Eliane, my wife, made my son cry and I had to go out for a walk in the fresh air.

With Hen, there had been no such problems with other kids.

She seemed invincible.

There was nobody who didn't know her, nobody who had a

who had a pet she didn't know the name of I was jealous of her recall for names and faces her enthusiasm for other people's lives she seemed able to devour them like books and yet I could never shake the feeling that some of my awkwardness had been passed on to her some of this incapacity I have like anger and failure always there beneath the surface does everyone have that when I look to her I'd worry that they don't and that I'm not normal and I've passed this on this abnormality to her

For all her abilities in the general bustle of life, I have felt uneasy watching her in smaller groups.

In a pair, she seems lost.

Did they like her enough?

Did they get it?

Was she able to engage?

Well, here they come anyway, I said.

I realised Aidan had already moved away and I looked around for him, but he'd faded into the rows of other dads.

hen was coming out her class finally emerged in a clipped military line and for a split second i thought she wasn't going to be there the ground started to open up and then it was okay hen was at the back of the line she looked the same as always from that distance it was the same walk as ever the same everything and she saw me and i waved the exact same wave everything was the same my body reacted the way it always did

A fullness suddenly, a small and regular display of balloons in the stomach, in the lungs, the air sweetened.

I waved at her teacher to acknowledge that I was here to take her home and Hen was released.

She charged towards me and leapt.

I held her tight and breathed her in.

It was real, her voice, her sound, the smell of her clothes and her end of day breath.

It was all completely real, only I could not see her face.

I suppose it can be like that.

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