Big Jay Oakerson

Give me a little smidge. Well, the first girl I ever drove... Well, I'll go back to that in a second. But this girl, she went inside the... She went to the guy's house. And I'm just waiting in the car. And then she comes back like three minutes later. What? And she goes... He said that I'm not what he was expecting. And he sent me... I was like, I saw coming. And she goes...

And now no matter what, the guy's got to pay X amount for me. Yeah. For the drive or whatever. It was like 25 bucks. That meant the world to me at the time for sure. And so she was like, he's not. She goes, I was like, oh. I was like, so he just gave you like the, you know, the cancel money or whatever. And she was like, no, he wouldn't give me any money at all. And I was like, shit. That's it.

And now no matter what, the guy's got to pay X amount for me. Yeah. For the drive or whatever. It was like 25 bucks. That meant the world to me at the time for sure. And so she was like, he's not. She goes, I was like, oh. I was like, so he just gave you like the, you know, the cancel money or whatever. And she was like, no, he wouldn't give me any money at all. And I was like, shit. That's it.

And I just got to hedge the bets. You know, I'm like. what does this asshole look like? Cause you're waiting to hear like, Hey, so I can go find him. But like, I'm really just asking. I'm like, is this worth 25 bucks for me to go knock on this guy's door? And, uh, she was like, he's like this little like nerdy, whatever. So I was like, Oh, good, good.

And I just got to hedge the bets. You know, I'm like. what does this asshole look like? Cause you're waiting to hear like, Hey, so I can go find him. But like, I'm really just asking. I'm like, is this worth 25 bucks for me to go knock on this guy's door? And, uh, she was like, he's like this little like nerdy, whatever. So I was like, Oh, good, good.

So I go, I knock on the door and I was like, and she kind of came with me, which I didn't think was a good idea. And, uh, he opens the door, you know, with kind of like, I don't want like trouble thing. And I was like, I was like, no, no, I just got to like, you have to, you're supposed to give like 50 bucks, I guess like 25 for each of us or something like that.

So I go, I knock on the door and I was like, and she kind of came with me, which I didn't think was a good idea. And, uh, he opens the door, you know, with kind of like, I don't want like trouble thing. And I was like, I was like, no, no, I just got to like, you have to, you're supposed to give like 50 bucks, I guess like 25 for each of us or something like that.

And he was like, uh, he's like, oh, well I don't, he was basically a dick. He was like, I don't have the money. And I'm like,

And he was like, uh, he's like, oh, well I don't, he was basically a dick. He was like, I don't have the money. And I'm like,

why do you gotta give it and then she just busts the door open and started like unhooking his vcr well i'm taking something with me or something like that like i got her not to do that ultimately but like she was planning on walking out there with something and then having to drive a rejected hooker home is such a hilarious like conversation yeah she's like actually i probably went in there with a bad attitude because i didn't want to fuck him like sure yeah sweetheart you got it

why do you gotta give it and then she just busts the door open and started like unhooking his vcr well i'm taking something with me or something like that like i got her not to do that ultimately but like she was planning on walking out there with something and then having to drive a rejected hooker home is such a hilarious like conversation yeah she's like actually i probably went in there with a bad attitude because i didn't want to fuck him like sure yeah sweetheart you got it

but i'm glad i didn't get his vcr i didn't even fucking want it dude the first girl i ever drove i remember being like impressed by her because she uh she was just pretty one it'd be funny if you're like 12 and this is just your paper route I was 18, I think. Damn. 18 or 19. I only did this for a very short amount of time.

but i'm glad i didn't get his vcr i didn't even fucking want it dude the first girl i ever drove i remember being like impressed by her because she uh she was just pretty one it'd be funny if you're like 12 and this is just your paper route I was 18, I think. Damn. 18 or 19. I only did this for a very short amount of time.

My friend, Ernie, was dating a girl whose dad was just like probably like weird connected shit or something like that. And it was like they had a guy who like a French stripper. It was supposed to just be strippers ultimately. And like, yeah, you just go there and whatever. I found out very quick because the guy was like, All the other drivers for this company were like old men.

My friend, Ernie, was dating a girl whose dad was just like probably like weird connected shit or something like that. And it was like they had a guy who like a French stripper. It was supposed to just be strippers ultimately. And like, yeah, you just go there and whatever. I found out very quick because the guy was like, All the other drivers for this company were like old men.

I remember asking the guy one time, like, how the fuck? Yeah. It's like, am I the only... And I feel like I'm in danger a lot. And he was like, well, they have guns. Like, you don't have a gun? And I was like, no. And he was like, do you want one? And I was like... No. And he's like, you sure? I'm like, yeah, dude, because I get too nervous.

I remember asking the guy one time, like, how the fuck? Yeah. It's like, am I the only... And I feel like I'm in danger a lot. And he was like, well, they have guns. Like, you don't have a gun? And I was like, no. And he was like, do you want one? And I was like... No. And he's like, you sure? I'm like, yeah, dude, because I get too nervous.

I'm going to pull out way too early because I'll be nervous. It's always like 15 guys, you know what I mean? I've had him say things like, you're supposed to stop us if we do anything. And I'd be like, yeah, me and this guy are supposed to stop us. I'd be in a circle already pointing at everybody. Trying to John Wick both hands. Yeah, it was terrifying. You said a bachelor party in the Poconos.

I'm going to pull out way too early because I'll be nervous. It's always like 15 guys, you know what I mean? I've had him say things like, you're supposed to stop us if we do anything. And I'd be like, yeah, me and this guy are supposed to stop us. I'd be in a circle already pointing at everybody. Trying to John Wick both hands. Yeah, it was terrifying. You said a bachelor party in the Poconos.

No, I was always last. Same company as the one I did the dressing up at kids' parties for.