Brené Brown

And I started whispering every time I would do a weightlifting thing, strong ground, strong ground.

Strength and longevity.

Mentally, physically, spiritually and emotionally.

I will.

I have enjoyed every minute of this.

I would say it has not been easy because we went to some hard places together, but it's been meaningful.

Thank you.

Joten aloitan tästä. Viime vuosikymmeniä aiemmin suunnittelija kertoi minua, koska olin tekemässä puheenvuoroa. Hän kertoi ja sanoi, että minulla on todella haastavaa, kuinka kirjoittaa sinua pienellä kirjalla. Mä ajattelin, että mikä on haastavaa. Hän sanoi, että kun näin sinut puhumaan, niin minä kertoisin sinut tutkijaksi, mutta olen varma, että jos minä kertoisin sinut tutkijaksi, niin kukaan ei tule, koska he luovat, että sinä olet haastava ja erilainen.

Hän sanoi, että se, mitä tykkäsin teidän puheessanne, on se, että olet opettaja, joten ajattelin, että kutsun sinut opettajaksi. Ja tietysti akadeeminen, epäselvä osa minua sanoi, että kutsutko minua mitä? Ja hän sanoi, että kutsun sinut opettajaksi. Ja minä sanoin, että miksi ei Magic Pixie? Minä sanoin, että minä en... Pitäkääpä miettiä tätä heti. Ja niin yritin kutsua myöhemmin.

Ajattelin, että olen historiallinen. Olen kvalitettavissa tutkijoissa, minä saan tarinoita, se on se, mitä teen. Ehkä tarinoita on vain dataa, jota on olemassa. Ehkä olen vain historiallinen. Sanoin, että miksi ei sanota vain, että olen tutkijan historiallinen. Hän sanoi, että ei ole mitään.

Olen tutkijana ja puheenjohtaja. Puhumme tänään yhdessä ympäristöä. Haluan puhua teille ja kertoa tarinoista, jotka ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni ympäristöni

When I was a young researcher, doctoral student, my first year I had a research professor who said to us, here's the thing, if you cannot measure it, it does not exist. And I thought he was just sweet talking me. I was like,

Really? And he's like, absolutely. So you have to understand that I have a bachelor's in social work, a master's in social work, and I was getting my PhD in social work. So my entire academic career was surrounded by people who kind of believed in the life's messy, love it, you know, and I'm more the life's messy, clean it up, organize it, and put it into a bento box.

To think that I had found my way, to found a career that takes me, really one of the big sayings in social work is lean into the discomfort of the work. I'm like, knock discomfort upside the head and move it over and get all A's. That was my mantra. I was very excited about this. I thought, you know what, this is the career for me because I am interested in some messy topics, but I want to be able to make them not messy.

Haluan ymmärtää heitä. Haluan hakeutua näihin asioihin, joita tiedän olevan tärkeitä, ja laittaa koodin kaikille nähdä. Aloitin seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi seuraavaksi

This is what it's all about. It doesn't matter whether you talk to people who work in social justice and mental health and abuse and neglect. What we know is that connection, the ability to feel connected, is neurobiologically, that's how we're wired, it's why we're here. So I thought, you know what, I'm going to start with connection.

Well, you know that situation where you get an evaluation from your boss, and she tells you 37 things that you do really awesome, and one thing that you count an opportunity for growth?

All you can think about is that opportunity for growth, right? Well, apparently this is the way my work went as well, because when you ask people about love, they tell you about heartbreak. When you ask people about belonging, they'll tell you their most excruciating experiences of being excluded. And when you ask people about connection, the stories they told me were about disconnection. So very quickly, really about six weeks into this research, I ran into this unnamed thing,

that absolutely unraveled connection in a way that I didn't understand or had never seen. I pulled back out of the research and thought, I need to figure out what this is. It turned out to be shame. Shame is really easily understood as the fear of disconnection. Is there something about me that if other people know it or see it,

that I won't be worthy of connection. The things I can tell you about it, it's universal. We all have it. The only people who don't experience shame have no capacity for human empathy or connection. No one wants to talk about it, and the less you talk about it, the more you have it. What underpinned this shame, this I'm not good enough, which we all know that feeling, I'm not blank enough, I'm not thin enough, rich enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, promoted enough,