Brett Neustrom

I feel like I wanted to be a lifeguard because I'm, like, people who are lifeguards are hot.

And so, like, 15-year-old me was, like, I'm not hot, but I feel like if I'm a lifeguard, I will be hotter, which wasn't the case.

And one time there was a kid who I thought was drowning.

This was the last day I worked.

And so I, like, you have to blow.

Yeah, you have to blow an air horn, which I'm, like, let's draw more attention to me in this situation.

someone's drowning oh shit so i jump in the kid of course learns how to fucking swim start swimming away from me i'm like i did not just blow that air horn for this kid to learn how to fucking so i'm like paddling after i'm like grabbing his leg and so you start drowning yeah but no i literally started drowning him and then like i helped him to the side he's like what why did you do that i was like you were you weren't struggling he's like no i was like you literally were and so then i

I have to go talk to, cause of course there's paperwork for this.

Um, so I'm like beefing with like a fucking eight year old and I'm like talking to his mom.

I was like, he literally couldn't swim.

And he's like, no, I, anyway, the last day I worked as a lifeguard.

I saw that.

Pull the fucking tape.

Cause we had security camera.

I'm like, we could, we could pull the tapes.

And similar to like the, like cone getting shoved up an ass.

It's like, what am I doing?

What am I doing?

Exactly.

Do you think you're in the right profession now?