Bryce Carver
speaker
357 appearances
3 recordings
1 series
first heard Mar 2025
last heard Mar 2025
Bryce Carver’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
And so I think like if you zoom out and take a broad perspective of porn, right, I think there's a lot more negatives and positives to it in my opinion. I think that's why people cheat is because they watch porn. Because here's like – I feel like I would probably cheat without porn. Okay, but okay, good, good. Okay, so I think so. Here's why.
I think when people cheat because their definition of love is the feeling I get, and if you're not giving me the feeling of butterflies and excitement and this rush of dopamine, then I'm not going to choose to show up. And because I... because you don't make me excited, I'm not choosing to show up in the highs or lows. And now I'm questioning the choice I made for you.
Whereas the Bible would say this is reversed. Love is a choice. I choose to love Jesus. So because I choose to love Jesus, I show up in the highs and the lows with Jesus. No conditions. But because I show up, no matter the conditions, it stirs my affections for him. I think in the same way, when I make a commitment to someone, that's why I think sex and love is so special.
When I choose to love my girlfriend, I want to marry my girlfriend one day. I choose to love her. Despite how hard life gets, despite how great life gets, I'm going to choose to show up for her. And because I choose to show up for her, you understand, like there's days where, you know, excitement and feelings aren't always there.
But when you choose to show up for that person, those moments, it stirs the affections for them. And so I recognize, like, I recognize that I've never had sex before. And... Hopefully, Lord willing, one day I'm gonna get married and I'm not gonna know what I'm doing. And I think that's okay. I think it's a beautiful thing that I've saved myself for the person I'm committing to.
And then I'm gonna learn and grow and adapt with that person that I've made a commitment to. But from a broad perspective, that's like people watch porn and they go, oh, this is exciting. And I think porn offers this perspective of sex that's just not real. I think porn creates a fantasy that is just not realistic. And then people expect this is what sex to be like.
And then they get there and then they bomb blow up a bunch of relationships that they've got because their perspective of sex and love has been twisted because of porn.
Sure. I think, I think it, I think it just paints that picture. Right. And so for people, so another thing you said earlier was like, you think that there's a healthy view of masturbation, right. And testosterone and things like that. Well, my perspective, why couldn't you just redirect the text testosterone to the gym? Right.
So last night I played basketball for three hours and I'm just like physically tired. Right. And so like, I just want to go to sleep. Whereas I feel like nighttime, like I said earlier, the human willpower decreases over time. And a lot of people that I know that struggle with watching porn and masturbation from a Christian perspective, they do it at nighttime.
Well, why couldn't they just redirect it in the gym? Like what you're saying, well, it feels good to get this testosterone out. Well, I could redirect that testosterone at the gym for like 45 minutes to two hours. And then I'd be pretty dead set. Then I wouldn't need to do that.
And so the Bible says that a fruit of the Spirit, a fruit of the Holy Spirit living inside of you and giving you strength is self-control. And I think that is a super crucial aspect to not only just regular life, but like sexual urges.
Because you can't, you're a human being and you have to like, as a human being, from zoomed out from religion or Christianity, you have to acknowledge the fact that people have sex drives. But to be able to redirect the sex drive from this, but to be able to have self-control through the spirit of God to say, I'm going to redirect my testosterone now to the gym because I love God.
And I believe God has made sex, this beautiful thing and a covenantal marriage for one man and one woman to do this thing. And so I'm just not going to do this now or even now. Like I bet you would understand too, like from a broad perspective, girls care how guys see them, right?
Now, imagine in a marriage if a girl is trying so hard to make their husband love them by dressing up and putting on makeup and then finding out that their husband is watching porn. They would probably be devastated knowing that their husband is more attracted to girls on a screen than their actual wife. Whereas the husband can have self-control to say, I'm actually not going to watch porn.
I'm attracted to my wife and I love my wife and I'm going to show up for her. And I just think it's super unrealistic to kind of like... to kind of like create this like thing of like like sex is this this worldview and this and this lifestyle like I, I can't get behind. I think there's just more to life than sex. I think sex is enjoyable in marriage. I think it's a gift.
But I think to take that outside of this covenant of marriage and this enjoyable thing that you do with a person you make a commitment to and it's an act of intimacy, according to the Bible, making it an intimate act that you do with someone dishing that out to multiple people. to me, devalues the intimacy aspect of it.
I think intimacy is valuable, right? So if I'm gonna be honest like if I caught my wife if I was married I caught my wife watching porn it would make me not want to be with her if I'm being totally honest with you and here's why it's because if the very thing that we get to do in a marriage is have sex and enjoy this thing and
and then you're withholding that from me and finding an avenue somewhere else, finding the sense of pleasure, pleasuring yourself to something that you're watching on the screen versus finding it with the person that you've made a covenant marriage to, my intimacy isn't valuable to you anymore. And so therefore it makes me not want to be with you.
And so I can understand why people could see that. But then you also have to understand like your worldview is different than my worldview. So you're like, well, it's not a big deal to me, but it is a big deal to me because I think intimacy is valuable and I don't dish it out to anyone. And this is what I'm getting at.
I want to be careful because I don't want to bash people that have had sex in the past. I believe if you come to Jesus Christ, he offers forgiveness, and you can wipe the slate clean as if you've never done it before, and you can wait. I'm not saying that Jesus makes you a virgin again, but Jesus gives you this perspective where I'm going to wait until marriage now for my husband.
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