Carla Kaufman Sloan

Like when you need a lift, they're very intelligent about when to pop a sign into your path.

And that's what happened to me one day when I was overwhelmed with grief.

It was like two years after Caldera died, and I was working really hard not to –

cry in front of Caleb anymore because I just felt like he had had enough and I'm not saying crying is bad because it's not you need to cry you need to get it out but I was like okay hold it together and I get out of the car to take him in to get some food and I look down at the ground and there's a

heart-shaped leaf on the ground, which I think is also a sign people get a lot, but I had never gotten one before.

And I looked down and I picked it up and I said, Caleb, look at this.

And he goes, oh, a heart from Calder and just went on about his business because kids are so like open and made sense to him.

That's what it was.

And let's go get our food now.

And so that was my first heart-shaped leaf.

But I do feel like you can ask for them.

And I really had an interesting experience lately.

So I've started leading a grief group in Miami with another parent who lost her son.

It's all parents who've lost their children or whose children have lost their bodies.

And we get together and we talk about the signs we've gotten.

And they're always amazing.

Like the kids are amazing with the signs they send us.

But I thought, oh, let's do something fun.

Let's ask for a specific sign for all of us so that we can all see if we get the same sign.

And we asked for a pink elephant.