Charles Duhigg
speaker
1,650 appearances
6 recordings
6 series
first heard Jan 2026
last heard 1 Jul
Charles Duhigg’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
Trend
recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 6 in all, peaking in Feb 2026 with 2.
Appearances
We're solving this question together.
Interesting.
And when we're in conflict, particularly in a marriage, we have this instinct to try and control things because we feel conflict's scary, right?
You want to control.
And the easiest thing to do is try and control the other person.
You're wrong.
You should believe this.
If you say that, I'm going to leave the room.
But what researchers have found is that the way that you say, like, we're going to focus on the problem is instead of trying to control each other, you try and control things together.
controlling when this argument takes place.
Like instead of doing it at two o'clock in the morning.
When you're both exhausted.
Yeah, we're gonna wait till 10 a.m.
when we like have some time.
Or trying to control the boundaries of the fight, right?
Like instead of where are we gonna spend New Year's and your mother-in-law drives me crazy and we don't have enough money.
Like both of you sitting down and saying, okay, the thing we're gonna talk about is where are we spending New Year's?
Not about mothers, not about like money.
Like let's control the boundaries of this discussion together.
Suddenly you're on the same side of the table.
Showing 761–780 of 1,650 · page 39 of 83
← Previous
Next →