Christiana
speaker
1,364 appearances
23 recordings
1 series
first heard Nov 2024
last heard Jun 2025
Christiana’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
Obie's mom, why are you always having babies? And for a lot of women, you don't want to just be known as a mother. You still want to feel like yourself, but you have to find a new self every time. And that's very unsettling. You know, so like postpartum is a big thing. And I think it's not necessarily recognized. It's not talked about.
And there's a lot of shame around it because no one wants to feel like they're weak or they're inadequate. You know, and I still think that's even in the most developed societies or more supportive society, we still haven't figured out how to help women in that next life phase.
Well, for Obi and for Luna, I did a thing called Omogwu, which is in Igbo culture, the 40 days after you have a baby. My mum came and my dad, being very modern, also joined my mum for this thing. The first time we did this, I can't believe I'm doing this. But he came out and they did all of that. They'd made the pepper soups and my mum was doing the belly binding and all of that stuff.
This time, we didn't do it. But yeah, that whole thing of being...
really having people around you there's a tiktok video that's gone super viral um of as a group of black women they drive up to their friend's house they're playing girl by destiny's child and they're screaming it and the their friend closes the window and shuts the curtains and they're like girl they're singing the song that you need to come outside and they break down the door basically she was postpartum and she'd been sending these texts about um
not feeling too good. And they were like, we broke down the door to see her. And I think if you're in a culture where it's not like South Africa or Nigeria or developing countries where the system is in place, your friends need to be willing to break down the door. Just intrude. Because in the West, you're so...
afraid of intruding your personal space is overly respected you know there's cultures where people just show up to your house here you plan hey Josh are you home yeah you go to a restaurant here you don't even go to people's house I think don't be afraid to intrude in those words like you good you good you good because I think most women and men are afraid to ask for help so you have to just like do the thing don't say what do you need just do a thing
Do you want kids?
All the dads now are old dads, by the way, Josh.
Wise dad, yeah.
Should life be like that? Trevor, do you want kids?
That's for another episode.
Oh, you haven't?
Oh, interesting.
I think you two both make great fathers.
I think you make great fathers and... Maybe one of the sad things about the world is that I have friends that are like child free by choice and they'd make the most brilliant mothers and fathers. And it's often the people that are making the real calculus who've done that deep spiritual work, who like experienced ego death.
who make the decision not to be parents, who would make brilliant parents. I agree with you. But at the end of the day, I think I don't see, I came to a point where I don't see my children as possessions. Maybe this is very Christian mentality. I'm like, you know, a gift from God. God has given me them to kind of guide in this world and uncover who they're supposed to be.
But they're not just mine. So I don't think you have to have children yourself biologically to parent.
And I feel like if we had a more expansive view of parenting, that children around us are our collective responsibility.
Then it's like, do you want biological children that live in your house?
Showing 901–920 of 1,364 · page 46 of 69
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