Dan Savage

Field's new Constellation features lets you link profiles with your friends and lovers, so new connections will see who you are within your social context. Start a group chat and find your people with your people. There's no limit to how many times you can change your sexuality, desires, interests, or gender identity at Field.

In fact, 62% of Field members evolved their sexuality, interests, and desires within their first year on the app. Whether you just moved to a new city and need to find a new community, or you're traveling and looking to meet new people, you can find a new bestie at Field. Download Field on the App Store or Google Play.

In fact, 62% of Field members evolved their sexuality, interests, and desires within their first year on the app. Whether you just moved to a new city and need to find a new community, or you're traveling and looking to meet new people, you can find a new bestie at Field. Download Field on the App Store or Google Play.

If you've been wondering about Field because you've heard so much about Field on this show from callers, not just from hosts, I, Dan Savage, recommend that you finally give Field a try yourself.

If you've been wondering about Field because you've heard so much about Field on this show from callers, not just from hosts, I, Dan Savage, recommend that you finally give Field a try yourself.

I have to reject one of your premises. You keep discussing a polyamorous relationship as if that is somehow antithetical to a committed relationship or the opposite of a committed relationship or not a committed relationship. A polyamorous relationship. with this woman that you describe as your partner. That is a committed relationship.

I have to reject one of your premises. You keep discussing a polyamorous relationship as if that is somehow antithetical to a committed relationship or the opposite of a committed relationship or not a committed relationship. A polyamorous relationship. with this woman that you describe as your partner. That is a committed relationship.

It's just not a sexually or emotionally exclusive relationship. So it doesn't sound to me like you have commitment issues. It sounds to me like you and this woman whose dog you killed are in conflict about your preferred relationship model. You want an open relationship, you want a polyamorous relationship, and what she wanted at the start and you were unable to give her

It's just not a sexually or emotionally exclusive relationship. So it doesn't sound to me like you have commitment issues. It sounds to me like you and this woman whose dog you killed are in conflict about your preferred relationship model. You want an open relationship, you want a polyamorous relationship, and what she wanted at the start and you were unable to give her

was a monogamous relationship. And so she, even though she's the one with another partner and you've only had a couple of flings, I guess, a couple of pieces on the side here and there, even though she's exercised her right as the partner of someone in an open polyamorous relationship to have another partner, it's not what she wanted.

was a monogamous relationship. And so she, even though she's the one with another partner and you've only had a couple of flings, I guess, a couple of pieces on the side here and there, even though she's exercised her right as the partner of someone in an open polyamorous relationship to have another partner, it's not what she wanted.

And now, now that you killed her dog, you use a lot of passive language, like the dog passed away, you killed her dog. now that you've killed her dog out of her mouth comes being with you feels like being with an abuser, which is, you know, you would never tell someone to stay with an abuser. If that's how she feels, she should obviously end this relationship.

And now, now that you killed her dog, you use a lot of passive language, like the dog passed away, you killed her dog. now that you've killed her dog out of her mouth comes being with you feels like being with an abuser, which is, you know, you would never tell someone to stay with an abuser. If that's how she feels, she should obviously end this relationship.

But the next thing out of her mouth seems to be based on your accounting of the exchanges that you've had with her after you killed her dog seemed to be that you owe her the monogamous commitment that she wanted all along. Or wanted at the start because you killed her dog.

But the next thing out of her mouth seems to be based on your accounting of the exchanges that you've had with her after you killed her dog seemed to be that you owe her the monogamous commitment that she wanted all along. Or wanted at the start because you killed her dog.

And I'm sorry, I don't want to say this about someone who's grieving the death of their dog at the hands or car of the person that they love. But that seems to me emotionally manipulative. That seems to me slightly opportunistic. Unless, you know, to be a little bit more generous, what she might be saying is right now while she's grieving,

And I'm sorry, I don't want to say this about someone who's grieving the death of their dog at the hands or car of the person that they love. But that seems to me emotionally manipulative. That seems to me slightly opportunistic. Unless, you know, to be a little bit more generous, what she might be saying is right now while she's grieving,

the death of her dog that you killed, she needs to be your sole focus.

the death of her dog that you killed, she needs to be your sole focus.

And if that's the conversation that she wants to have and you're leaving that out, I don't see why at this moment you couldn't come through with, particularly as you don't have another partner, centering this relationship for, I don't know, the next three months, six months, while you work through the pain and the guilt and the grief and the horror of the death of her dog. at your hand's car.