Dan Savage

By calling him up and asking him if he's seen Wicked and you want to see Wicked and you want to go to Wicked with somebody. That's kind of gay coded. It's a hint. It's a gesture. But it's also like the most popular movie in America and straight people are seeing it too. So it's not necessarily him outing himself by expressing any interest in going to see Wicked with his – Crazy uncle.

By calling him up and asking him if he's seen Wicked and you want to see Wicked and you want to go to Wicked with somebody. That's kind of gay coded. It's a hint. It's a gesture. But it's also like the most popular movie in America and straight people are seeing it too. So it's not necessarily him outing himself by expressing any interest in going to see Wicked with his – Crazy uncle.

And then who knows if you had a tighter relationship with him, if you became his confidant, who knows what he might confide in you. And maybe that's what he needs, but you can scare somebody who's in the closet, deeper into the closet by looking right at them and saying, I know. And now you know that I know, and you probably know that other people know, and

And then who knows if you had a tighter relationship with him, if you became his confidant, who knows what he might confide in you. And maybe that's what he needs, but you can scare somebody who's in the closet, deeper into the closet by looking right at them and saying, I know. And now you know that I know, and you probably know that other people know, and

Sometimes when you say to somebody, you're gay, right? They double, triple, quadruple down on the denial. They deny it. They say, no, they're not. And they retreat further into the closet. It can make it harder for them, but it's such, it's such a tight rope.

Sometimes when you say to somebody, you're gay, right? They double, triple, quadruple down on the denial. They deny it. They say, no, they're not. And they retreat further into the closet. It can make it harder for them, but it's such, it's such a tight rope.

You want to err on the side of not driving somebody deeper into the closet, but you also want to err on the side of not making somebody feel so isolated, miserable, unseen, and alone that But they make a worse choice than closeted. But my advice to you, ask your nephew he wants to go fucking see Wicked and grab dinner sometime and just hang out. And then see where the conversation goes.

You want to err on the side of not driving somebody deeper into the closet, but you also want to err on the side of not making somebody feel so isolated, miserable, unseen, and alone that But they make a worse choice than closeted. But my advice to you, ask your nephew he wants to go fucking see Wicked and grab dinner sometime and just hang out. And then see where the conversation goes.

People sometimes use chaser to mean anybody who's in pursuit of anything, that there are people out there who are... deep throat chasers, people out there who are daddy chasers. But when it's used all by itself in the context of Grindr, it doesn't mean bug chaser.

People sometimes use chaser to mean anybody who's in pursuit of anything, that there are people out there who are... deep throat chasers, people out there who are daddy chasers. But when it's used all by itself in the context of Grindr, it doesn't mean bug chaser.

There were people out there who were fetishizing getting infected by HIV 10, 15 years ago, pre-prep, before prep, and people out there who were fetishizing infecting other people with HIV. It was a very dark and desperate and sad and despairing moment for a lot of

There were people out there who were fetishizing getting infected by HIV 10, 15 years ago, pre-prep, before prep, and people out there who were fetishizing infecting other people with HIV. It was a very dark and desperate and sad and despairing moment for a lot of

gay men in the early 90s when the deaths were ramping up and up and up and some attention was fading from HIV and we'd been marinating in safe sex messages for more than a decade and there was a kind of perverse reaction to the condom norm and the pressure of constantly feeling like there was this thing out there lurking waiting to kill you, HIV, and some people...

gay men in the early 90s when the deaths were ramping up and up and up and some attention was fading from HIV and we'd been marinating in safe sex messages for more than a decade and there was a kind of perverse reaction to the condom norm and the pressure of constantly feeling like there was this thing out there lurking waiting to kill you, HIV, and some people...

fetishized running at that thing because it felt dangerous and risky and transgressive but along comes prep and that bug chaser sense of chaser just went the fuck away hiv was no longer a death sentence and the power of the transgression and seeking out hiv or giving somebody else hiv and fuck those people who knowingly gave other people hiv at that moment fuck them just kind of evaporated

fetishized running at that thing because it felt dangerous and risky and transgressive but along comes prep and that bug chaser sense of chaser just went the fuck away hiv was no longer a death sentence and the power of the transgression and seeking out hiv or giving somebody else hiv and fuck those people who knowingly gave other people hiv at that moment fuck them just kind of evaporated

So when you see chaser now out there, it means often chubby chaser, but usually when somebody uses means chubby chaser, they're into big guys, big women. It's qualified. The chubby is there before the chaser chaser on grinder can often mean usually means somebody who is seeking out trans women.

So when you see chaser now out there, it means often chubby chaser, but usually when somebody uses means chubby chaser, they're into big guys, big women. It's qualified. The chubby is there before the chaser chaser on grinder can often mean usually means somebody who is seeking out trans women.

We used to call them, when I did drag, when we went to the bars, there weren't a lot of trans women around then. There were tons of trans women around. They weren't at the queer bars. Trans women 30 years ago weren't integrated into the gay, lesbian, bi, trans community in the way they are now. And I'm delighted they are now.

We used to call them, when I did drag, when we went to the bars, there weren't a lot of trans women around then. There were tons of trans women around. They weren't at the queer bars. Trans women 30 years ago weren't integrated into the gay, lesbian, bi, trans community in the way they are now. And I'm delighted they are now.