Dave Evans

But Dave and I have been in wonderful communities.

I've been in this group of men, a men's group for 32 years because I started when my son got born and I needed to figure out how to raise a son.

And we end up, we've been around long enough that we've had some guys die and gone to their funerals and said wonderful things about them.

And then we decided, why don't we wait till we die before we say wonderful things about each other?

So we have a protocol in our men's group where you can say, I'm going to die next week.

I'd like everybody to write a eulogy.

And then you come in and then

lay there quietly and you listen to people say the most wonderful things about you right because eulogies are not about oh well you know dave had a big to-do list he crashed off lots of things his powerpoints were very well done and he always got his budget set on time nobody says that yeah they say what is a good man he was a wonderful husband he was a great father so um

Do that.

Have your friends write your eulogy and find out what you really mean to people.

It's amazing.

And by the way, I don't think anybody writing their eulogy or those questions says, I wish I had more, I think I want to have more money by the time I'm X. Because you get to the second half of life, assuming that money is enough and energy is not, or whatever, but it's hard.

You start to realize that those kinds of transactional accomplishments, while important and interesting ways of keeping score,

aren't the things that are going to make you happy when you get to that point?

So I think, you know, I really encourage the folks who are thinking about this stuff, think a little, you know, give yourself a little bit of time, turn off the phone and give yourself a little bit of time to think about, you know, what would I hope people say about me?

And how do I become the person

that deserves them to say that.

And if that stuff comes up, and this could be connected to your wild card, it could be just connected to where you are in your journey.

If that stuff comes up,

Where you, you know, a lot of times when I do these, because, you know, one of the first things I said to Dave when we set this up is, you know, we got to do everything we put in the books.