David Archuleta

And they're like, wait a second.

If I lie, I can manipulate other people.

I can gaslight and I can get away with a lot of crazy shit here.

And so, and they do.

Right.

And so, um,

But a lot of the members themselves are very earnest, very sincere.

They want to do the right thing.

They don't want to be bad.

And the shame that's instilled in them makes them so afraid of being bad.

But it also can be...

a double-edged sword because while there's transparency in a lot of ways, there's suppression and repressed feelings and denial.

Like you kind of gaslight yourself.

So you're not aware of reality of a lot of situations where like, for example, like Jen, maybe with like the dynamic with her husband or

me with my sexuality.

Like there's a lot of like, I'm very honest, but I'm, I'm like so oblivious to this situation that's going on, like right in front of me and right.

I'm surrounded by,

Yeah.

It was kind of like I had...

It was like a, not a kink, but like, I want to say a shame kink, but like, it's like addicted to that.