David Sedaris

It bothered Hugh because Hugh's not a liar.

So Hugh would just have to change the subject.

So that's what he would do when people would say, are you and David married?

He would find some way to say, how long have you been married?

So he's relieved now that he can tell people about it.

But nobody came to me and said, I can't believe it.

I thought we were friends, and here you've been married 10 years, and you didn't tell me.

Because to me, it doesn't mean anything.

Like, I never think of Hugh as my husband.

I mean, I don't want to be with anybody else, and we've been together for a long time, and I adore him, you know, but it doesn't mean anything to me to be married to him.

You know, some people have suggested that the veracity of your stories, because they include your past and they're about your past, that the dialogue can be so brilliant and kind of well-written in a way that no one ever truly speaks.

And I know you keep endless diary entries and you have all that.

But I'm curious because the last time you were on this show, you said your father was, quote, not a good person, but he was a great character.

Do you think of people as characters first and people second?

No, I think of them as people, but then if I'm writing an essay, I think of them as characters.

Because if you're on the page, you're a character.

When you're in real life, you're a person.

Hugh is a good character.

My sister Gretchen, I adore my sister Gretchen.

She's not a good character.