Dr. Becky Kennedy

My kid was left out from that birthday party and they're so upset.

That means I'm a bad mom.

All of those are actually the exact same thing.

I'm using my kid's behavior as a way of judging my parenting.

And I'm sure you know about this outside of parenting too.

The most empowering thing you can do as a person, definitely as a woman, is to learn to gaze in and get to know what's inside yourself before you gaze out.

To rely on, okay, well, what moments happened with my kid today that felt good?

Where I felt present, where I wasn't on my phone, where I listened.

I actually think what can happen as you shift from always looking out as a barometer to something more internal is you actually realize so many of the moments you thought you were failing as a mom maybe were your best moments.

I was able to be there when my kid has a tantrum and try to stay calm.

I was able to sit with them in their disappointment of not being invited to the birthday party.

And instead of planning a different party for them to just, quote, be happy, I showed them through my behavior that we could just get through things like that together.

I mean, and think about it for all the things you do in the workplace.

I can't imagine you're a successful business leader CEO by saying, I made a certain decision and my employees are upset about it.

So I'm going to change my decision.

You wouldn't be sitting there, would you?

I don't think so.

Well, first of all, being a parent is being a leader.

You're the leader of your family system.

So just thinking about it that way, it should make sense that leadership principles in the workplace or on the sports field should apply to the family.