Dr. Becky Kennedy

Your ability to tolerate frustration, which in the world we live in, is getting to be a rarer and rarer skill because dopamine and quick wins and easy satisfaction is just dime a dozen on our phones or on iPads for kids, etc. And so to me, that's just really important. I think everything that happens in adulthood that really leads to true success, none of it comes from childhood early success.

It actually comes from childhood success. tolerance of frustration and struggling. That's what makes for gritty, resilient adults is I don't expect to be successful right away. I'm able to tolerate working towards something and not yet having success. Ironically, the longer we're able to tolerate the space between wanting and having or between not knowing and knowing, the more successful we are.

It actually comes from childhood success. tolerance of frustration and struggling. That's what makes for gritty, resilient adults is I don't expect to be successful right away. I'm able to tolerate working towards something and not yet having success. Ironically, the longer we're able to tolerate the space between wanting and having or between not knowing and knowing, the more successful we are.

It actually comes from childhood success. tolerance of frustration and struggling. That's what makes for gritty, resilient adults is I don't expect to be successful right away. I'm able to tolerate working towards something and not yet having success. Ironically, the longer we're able to tolerate the space between wanting and having or between not knowing and knowing, the more successful we are.

And so the only thing I think that relates to is, okay, I let my kids jump on the couch too. My couch looks like shit, to be honest. And again, I'm like, when my kids are out of the house, we'll figure that out. It's not a value. But again, if I think, is that one sign that my kids struggle to hear no and respect it and tolerate frustration?

And so the only thing I think that relates to is, okay, I let my kids jump on the couch too. My couch looks like shit, to be honest. And again, I'm like, when my kids are out of the house, we'll figure that out. It's not a value. But again, if I think, is that one sign that my kids struggle to hear no and respect it and tolerate frustration?

And so the only thing I think that relates to is, okay, I let my kids jump on the couch too. My couch looks like shit, to be honest. And again, I'm like, when my kids are out of the house, we'll figure that out. It's not a value. But again, if I think, is that one sign that my kids struggle to hear no and respect it and tolerate frustration?

And if I say, yes, it is, because I just don't really love setting boundaries, that's a different thing. That's not about fun and joy. That's about... poor kind of frustration tolerance environment. But if I say to myself, no, actually, that's just an example of joy and fun. And there's plenty of other situations in life where my kids are learning how to tolerate frustration.

And if I say, yes, it is, because I just don't really love setting boundaries, that's a different thing. That's not about fun and joy. That's about... poor kind of frustration tolerance environment. But if I say to myself, no, actually, that's just an example of joy and fun. And there's plenty of other situations in life where my kids are learning how to tolerate frustration.

And if I say, yes, it is, because I just don't really love setting boundaries, that's a different thing. That's not about fun and joy. That's about... poor kind of frustration tolerance environment. But if I say to myself, no, actually, that's just an example of joy and fun. And there's plenty of other situations in life where my kids are learning how to tolerate frustration.

Then again, that feels like an important ingredient in a good home.

Then again, that feels like an important ingredient in a good home.

Then again, that feels like an important ingredient in a good home.

That's exactly right. And I think what you're checking in with, Jordan, which is important, is what are my values? And you're saying like, I actually, I value being able to say yes to my kid when I can. Not from a place of fear, but from a place of fun. That's a fun thing to be able to run around on your couch as a kid. And if I value that, then I'm acting in line with my values.

That's exactly right. And I think what you're checking in with, Jordan, which is important, is what are my values? And you're saying like, I actually, I value being able to say yes to my kid when I can. Not from a place of fear, but from a place of fun. That's a fun thing to be able to run around on your couch as a kid. And if I value that, then I'm acting in line with my values.

That's exactly right. And I think what you're checking in with, Jordan, which is important, is what are my values? And you're saying like, I actually, I value being able to say yes to my kid when I can. Not from a place of fear, but from a place of fun. That's a fun thing to be able to run around on your couch as a kid. And if I value that, then I'm acting in line with my values.

And that's a great parenting decision then.

And that's a great parenting decision then.

And that's a great parenting decision then.

There's so many big picture things you're saying. A strong belief I have is every parent is doing the best they can with the resources they have available. That's always been true. I really do believe that. That doesn't mean that we necessarily got everything we needed from our parents. They could have been doing the best they could.