Dr. Caroline Fleck

Yeah, it can be used to influence behavior. It can be used to reinforce behavioral changes. Another thing that's really controversial. Whenever I talk about that, people are like, that is so manipulative, that's so exploitative, you know, that you would actually use validation as reinforcement. In my experience, it is none of those things. It's very positive. I want people to validate me more.

Yeah, it can be used to influence behavior. It can be used to reinforce behavioral changes. Another thing that's really controversial. Whenever I talk about that, people are like, that is so manipulative, that's so exploitative, you know, that you would actually use validation as reinforcement. In my experience, it is none of those things. It's very positive. I want people to validate me more.

All right. And if they want to reinforce my behavior through validation, please go ahead. Like you can do that all day. I love it. That's fine.

All right. And if they want to reinforce my behavior through validation, please go ahead. Like you can do that all day. I love it. That's fine.

All right. And if they want to reinforce my behavior through validation, please go ahead. Like you can do that all day. I love it. That's fine.

That is my job. And I'm like having this moment as you're describing that of just this like warmth moment. this tingly warmth, like literally in my chest, because I have had that experience again and again and again with people both who are the victims in these situations, victims of pervasive invalidation, right? Who were told that their emotions don't matter, their bodies don't matter, right?

That is my job. And I'm like having this moment as you're describing that of just this like warmth moment. this tingly warmth, like literally in my chest, because I have had that experience again and again and again with people both who are the victims in these situations, victims of pervasive invalidation, right? Who were told that their emotions don't matter, their bodies don't matter, right?

That is my job. And I'm like having this moment as you're describing that of just this like warmth moment. this tingly warmth, like literally in my chest, because I have had that experience again and again and again with people both who are the victims in these situations, victims of pervasive invalidation, right? Who were told that their emotions don't matter, their bodies don't matter, right?

I've seen that side of it. I've also seen the perpetrators of those acts. And it's my job, oftentimes, to reform, to help those people change, which is a really difficult situation to be in when you have all these judgments, as one would, about what they're doing to themselves and to others. But when you flip that, when you are able to find something valid in their experience, it is...

I've seen that side of it. I've also seen the perpetrators of those acts. And it's my job, oftentimes, to reform, to help those people change, which is a really difficult situation to be in when you have all these judgments, as one would, about what they're doing to themselves and to others. But when you flip that, when you are able to find something valid in their experience, it is...

I've seen that side of it. I've also seen the perpetrators of those acts. And it's my job, oftentimes, to reform, to help those people change, which is a really difficult situation to be in when you have all these judgments, as one would, about what they're doing to themselves and to others. But when you flip that, when you are able to find something valid in their experience, it is...

It's a profound experience in both directions, both for me as the person working with that individual and then for that individual. All of these things that you're describing occur in cycles. If you look at the chain of cause and effect that led someone to be a rapist or to be X, Y, or Z, there's almost always a long history of invalidation, trauma behind that.

It's a profound experience in both directions, both for me as the person working with that individual and then for that individual. All of these things that you're describing occur in cycles. If you look at the chain of cause and effect that led someone to be a rapist or to be X, Y, or Z, there's almost always a long history of invalidation, trauma behind that.

It's a profound experience in both directions, both for me as the person working with that individual and then for that individual. All of these things that you're describing occur in cycles. If you look at the chain of cause and effect that led someone to be a rapist or to be X, Y, or Z, there's almost always a long history of invalidation, trauma behind that.

OK, so if you want to intervene in that cycle, you've got to be able to work with the perpetrators as well. Right. Like you have to if you're going to stop the cycle of violence, you have to intervene, you know, with those who are creating it. And in order to do that, you simply must be able to validate them. That's the only way to do it. It's the only way I know how to do it.

OK, so if you want to intervene in that cycle, you've got to be able to work with the perpetrators as well. Right. Like you have to if you're going to stop the cycle of violence, you have to intervene, you know, with those who are creating it. And in order to do that, you simply must be able to validate them. That's the only way to do it. It's the only way I know how to do it.

OK, so if you want to intervene in that cycle, you've got to be able to work with the perpetrators as well. Right. Like you have to if you're going to stop the cycle of violence, you have to intervene, you know, with those who are creating it. And in order to do that, you simply must be able to validate them. That's the only way to do it. It's the only way I know how to do it.

Yeah, and we have this feeling, I think, that they just don't deserve it. We're just shooting ourselves in the foot. And I think this has really become heightened as I see the politics playing out as they are. But the more entrenched we are in the belief that people don't deserve...

Yeah, and we have this feeling, I think, that they just don't deserve it. We're just shooting ourselves in the foot. And I think this has really become heightened as I see the politics playing out as they are. But the more entrenched we are in the belief that people don't deserve...

Yeah, and we have this feeling, I think, that they just don't deserve it. We're just shooting ourselves in the foot. And I think this has really become heightened as I see the politics playing out as they are. But the more entrenched we are in the belief that people don't deserve...