Dr. Caroline Fleck

But once you add invalidation into that mix, it's like a cowder peg explosion. Yeah, it's just boom. And we don't appreciate that, I think. And therefore, it's harder for us to validate people in those situations.

Exactly. So again, as therapists, we are trained to do this. And that's why I am so passionate about this subject. No, innately, that's not how we are driven to respond. We respond with emotion. We respond to threat. That's what we look for. That's what we're trying to protect against.

Exactly. So again, as therapists, we are trained to do this. And that's why I am so passionate about this subject. No, innately, that's not how we are driven to respond. We respond with emotion. We respond to threat. That's what we look for. That's what we're trying to protect against.

Exactly. So again, as therapists, we are trained to do this. And that's why I am so passionate about this subject. No, innately, that's not how we are driven to respond. We respond with emotion. We respond to threat. That's what we look for. That's what we're trying to protect against.

But we have strategies to help people communicate effectively, even when they're being hit with a lot of offensive behavior. So in those situations that you're describing, you probably don't understand the other person's perspective in those moments or certainly not empathize when someone's coming at you and there's a conflict. But at the very least, we can have you just mindfully attend.

But we have strategies to help people communicate effectively, even when they're being hit with a lot of offensive behavior. So in those situations that you're describing, you probably don't understand the other person's perspective in those moments or certainly not empathize when someone's coming at you and there's a conflict. But at the very least, we can have you just mindfully attend.

But we have strategies to help people communicate effectively, even when they're being hit with a lot of offensive behavior. So in those situations that you're describing, you probably don't understand the other person's perspective in those moments or certainly not empathize when someone's coming at you and there's a conflict. But at the very least, we can have you just mindfully attend.

So this is kind of the first step to validation. If you just, we use these two skills, attending and copying. If you use just these two skills, and when I am hit with somebody, like I have a narcissistic client across from me, and they're going on about how the school that I graduated from, you know, Really, do I really think Duke was where it's at for clinical psychology?

So this is kind of the first step to validation. If you just, we use these two skills, attending and copying. If you use just these two skills, and when I am hit with somebody, like I have a narcissistic client across from me, and they're going on about how the school that I graduated from, you know, Really, do I really think Duke was where it's at for clinical psychology?

So this is kind of the first step to validation. If you just, we use these two skills, attending and copying. If you use just these two skills, and when I am hit with somebody, like I have a narcissistic client across from me, and they're going on about how the school that I graduated from, you know, Really, do I really think Duke was where it's at for clinical psychology?

Because they've done their research and they want to know why I didn't go or get into these other schools, right? And you're just, I can see it in your face right now, like there's just that like, oh, screw you.

Because they've done their research and they want to know why I didn't go or get into these other schools, right? And you're just, I can see it in your face right now, like there's just that like, oh, screw you.

Because they've done their research and they want to know why I didn't go or get into these other schools, right? And you're just, I can see it in your face right now, like there's just that like, oh, screw you.

More than once. Versions of that, not necessarily... specific to that school, but then like undergrad. Oh, so you went to U of M. Oh, that's interesting. I went to Yale. Hmm. How did you end up going from- It's so obnoxious. Oh, it's so obnoxious, yeah. But again, that's why these folks are referred to me, right? Like they are that obnoxious- Like in their real lives. Yeah, yeah.

More than once. Versions of that, not necessarily... specific to that school, but then like undergrad. Oh, so you went to U of M. Oh, that's interesting. I went to Yale. Hmm. How did you end up going from- It's so obnoxious. Oh, it's so obnoxious, yeah. But again, that's why these folks are referred to me, right? Like they are that obnoxious- Like in their real lives. Yeah, yeah.

More than once. Versions of that, not necessarily... specific to that school, but then like undergrad. Oh, so you went to U of M. Oh, that's interesting. I went to Yale. Hmm. How did you end up going from- It's so obnoxious. Oh, it's so obnoxious, yeah. But again, that's why these folks are referred to me, right? Like they are that obnoxious- Like in their real lives. Yeah, yeah.

Then they're struggling, okay? So that's why they come to see me. I mean, they come to see me for some other reason, but it's pretty obvious right out the gate that that's probably- what's causing a lot of the problems.

Then they're struggling, okay? So that's why they come to see me. I mean, they come to see me for some other reason, but it's pretty obvious right out the gate that that's probably- what's causing a lot of the problems.

Then they're struggling, okay? So that's why they come to see me. I mean, they come to see me for some other reason, but it's pretty obvious right out the gate that that's probably- what's causing a lot of the problems.

Yeah.