Dr. Caroline Fleck

Like I totally understand why you want to do X, Y, or Z in this situation. I totally understand why you're upset or not upset in this situation. It's just not a message they're used to getting. And so it starts to, the wheels start turning and you can almost see it in real time of like what else have I been discrediting in my own experience? Like how far back does this go?

Like I totally understand why you want to do X, Y, or Z in this situation. I totally understand why you're upset or not upset in this situation. It's just not a message they're used to getting. And so it starts to, the wheels start turning and you can almost see it in real time of like what else have I been discrediting in my own experience? Like how far back does this go?

Like I totally understand why you want to do X, Y, or Z in this situation. I totally understand why you're upset or not upset in this situation. It's just not a message they're used to getting. And so it starts to, the wheels start turning and you can almost see it in real time of like what else have I been discrediting in my own experience? Like how far back does this go?

And that's when the work starts.

And that's when the work starts.

And that's when the work starts.

Oh my gosh, yes. So this is... We make this big divide between self and other. And in my experience, folks who treat others poorly don't treat themselves well either. Like the really critical folks, they're not like lavishing themselves with like, good job, buddy. Oh, you did a great job at your speech this morning. No, they're like highly self-critical.

Oh my gosh, yes. So this is... We make this big divide between self and other. And in my experience, folks who treat others poorly don't treat themselves well either. Like the really critical folks, they're not like lavishing themselves with like, good job, buddy. Oh, you did a great job at your speech this morning. No, they're like highly self-critical.

Oh my gosh, yes. So this is... We make this big divide between self and other. And in my experience, folks who treat others poorly don't treat themselves well either. Like the really critical folks, they're not like lavishing themselves with like, good job, buddy. Oh, you did a great job at your speech this morning. No, they're like highly self-critical.

So we treat others in some way, shape, or form the way we treat ourselves and vice versa.

So we treat others in some way, shape, or form the way we treat ourselves and vice versa.

So we treat others in some way, shape, or form the way we treat ourselves and vice versa.

Yeah. Yeah. You're not. You're not a happy person. In my experience, I don't know many people who are active assholes who are deeply happy. Yeah. The two things just don't go together.

Yeah. Yeah. You're not. You're not a happy person. In my experience, I don't know many people who are active assholes who are deeply happy. Yeah. The two things just don't go together.

Yeah. Yeah. You're not. You're not a happy person. In my experience, I don't know many people who are active assholes who are deeply happy. Yeah. The two things just don't go together.

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, that is what we were describing with like that that cycle of invalidation, everything else. Right. That's why I'm saying you got to intervene on the victim or the perpetrator. Everyone's hurting here. OK. So, yeah. Sorry. What was the initial question? I totally lost my train.

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, that is what we were describing with like that that cycle of invalidation, everything else. Right. That's why I'm saying you got to intervene on the victim or the perpetrator. Everyone's hurting here. OK. So, yeah. Sorry. What was the initial question? I totally lost my train.

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, that is what we were describing with like that that cycle of invalidation, everything else. Right. That's why I'm saying you got to intervene on the victim or the perpetrator. Everyone's hurting here. OK. So, yeah. Sorry. What was the initial question? I totally lost my train.

Oh, yeah. Self-compassion. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Self-compassion. Yeah, yeah, yeah.