Dr. Darby Saxbe

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745 appearances 1 recordings 1 series first heard Jul 2026 last heard 27 Jul

Dr. Darby Saxbe’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in Jul 2026 with 1.

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Modern Wisdom · The Painful Psychological Cost Of Becoming A Dad - Darby Saxbe - #1129 · 27 Jul 2026 podcast

So by some estimates, dad's daily time in parenting has tripled or even quadrupled compared to the father knows best dads of the 50s and 60s.

So there's been a huge uptick.

And what's interesting is that there was an inflection point around the pandemic where men who might have been commuting to an office and maybe missing a lot of the day-to-day stuff with their kids suddenly had the experience of

being hands-on parents in a different way.

And a lot of people wondered whether that uptick would persist, and it has.

So millennial dads are spending more time with kids than any other generation of U.S.

dads.

And there's evidence that Gen Z dads are spending even more time than millennial dads.

So there's been a pretty dramatic shift.

So it's interesting.

So in my book, I talk about a model of hunter-gatherer fatherhood, the ACA, which is a society in the Congo where men spend a lot of time within hand's reach of infants, and they're very involved in infant care.

And what's unique about the ACA

and this quality is shared by a number of other hunter-gatherer societies, is that they have a very egalitarian, flat social structure, and there's a lot of cooperative resource gathering.

So we know hunter-gatherer societies are the context in which we spent 95% of our human history.

So they tell us something about the environments within which we adapted, within which we evolved.

And we know that women contributed a ton of calories.

So when people say it's unnatural for women to work, in fact, women have been economically productive for most of our human history.

But in the ACA, the main form of resource gathering is joint cooperative net hunting.

So couples work together to gain resources for the society.

And as a result, really differentiated, specialized parenting roles don't make very much sense, right?

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