Dr. David Burns

But essentially, just to simplify what you're saying, which is already simple, is to say that we do have a choice about how we're going to interpret a situation, how we're going to think about it, and we can get into a hypnotic trance of despair and anger and humiliation and guilt and shame and thinking about what's wrong with me and...

woe be me and this is awful or we can be thinking about that person like where are they coming from you know why are they doing this is this how they get their kicks their thrills are they feeling insecure on some level whatever is going on with them and that also that could have to do with our body language and how we respond to them because we might say oh wow that

woe be me and this is awful or we can be thinking about that person like where are they coming from you know why are they doing this is this how they get their kicks their thrills are they feeling insecure on some level whatever is going on with them and that also that could have to do with our body language and how we respond to them because we might say oh wow that

that's even more colorful than the one you gave me yesterday, which itself was pretty far out. And I can't wait to see what you'll come up with for tomorrow. And I have to hand it to you. And you might consider a career as a horror novelist like Stephen King, and you could write awesome novels and make movies and make millions of dollars. I've got to hand it to you. You are good.

that's even more colorful than the one you gave me yesterday, which itself was pretty far out. And I can't wait to see what you'll come up with for tomorrow. And I have to hand it to you. And you might consider a career as a horror novelist like Stephen King, and you could write awesome novels and make movies and make millions of dollars. I've got to hand it to you. You are good.

You're a good shit, as they so often say.

You're a good shit, as they so often say.

So Manuel, can I – so instead of focusing on I must be a terrible person to being picked on, you're encouraging that child or whoever is being picked on to observe what's happening in the moment kind of in a neutral way. Like, oh, that's interesting. This is what's going on right now.

So Manuel, can I – so instead of focusing on I must be a terrible person to being picked on, you're encouraging that child or whoever is being picked on to observe what's happening in the moment kind of in a neutral way. Like, oh, that's interesting. This is what's going on right now.

They can invite me to beat up on myself for the next 12 hours, but I'm not obligated to accept the invitation.

They can invite me to beat up on myself for the next 12 hours, but I'm not obligated to accept the invitation.

Yeah, right. And that would be a great verbal response, too. Yeah, so you don't do nearly as good a job beating up on me as I do on myself, but I'll have to hand it to you. You come up with, you're more creative than I am.

Yeah, right. And that would be a great verbal response, too. Yeah, so you don't do nearly as good a job beating up on me as I do on myself, but I'll have to hand it to you. You come up with, you're more creative than I am.

Yeah, and you can put me number one on your fan club because I've been admiring you for a long time, you big, cute guy.

Yeah, and you can put me number one on your fan club because I've been admiring you for a long time, you big, cute guy.

Yeah, yeah. See, a lot of people do think about me a lot, and I'm just so glad to include you in the group.

Yeah, yeah. See, a lot of people do think about me a lot, and I'm just so glad to include you in the group.

Yeah, yeah. That's good. That's good. Okay, now, I'm telling myself that I'm a terrible, horrible person, and all these people are laughing at me and looking down on me, and I'm feeling incredibly ashamed and humiliated. I'm feeling weak and inadequate, and this fellow's really strong and... I might have to use my karate and kick him in the testicles.

Yeah, yeah. That's good. That's good. Okay, now, I'm telling myself that I'm a terrible, horrible person, and all these people are laughing at me and looking down on me, and I'm feeling incredibly ashamed and humiliated. I'm feeling weak and inadequate, and this fellow's really strong and... I might have to use my karate and kick him in the testicles.

And it just hurts me so badly to hurt someone like that. No, I'm just being ridiculous now. But I'm just feeling like I'm just a loser. So what help can you give me?