Dr. Ellen Langer

Gee, but you have to blame before you can forgive.

So our forgivers are our blamers.

Now, do you blame people for good things or bad things?

You blame people for bad things.

But things in and of themselves are neither good nor bad.

So what do we have here?

We have people who see the world negatively, who blame, then come to forgive.

Hardly divine.

So if you blame, it's better to forgive than not.

However, you shouldn't be blaming them in the first place because their behavior made some sense or else they wouldn't have done it.

So if you understand that their behavior was sensible, then there's no reason to blame them.

Then there's no opportunity necessary for forgiveness.

So we leave it at forgiveness rather than this whole better way of being.

So we have trying.

It's much better than giving up to try, right?

So we're always teaching kids to try.

Well, I did this study.

Well, then I was informed that this should be called the Yoda study, which I didn't realize.

And it is the Yoda study.

Don't try.