Dr. John Gottman

You know, you're such a fun person to be with. You don't have a problem saying what I'm hearing you say is that you think I'm really smart and you love spending time with me flows very easily. But if you're saying you abandoned me, you left me stranded there. You don't pay attention to me. You don't really care about what I have. And I have to repeat that.

You know, you're such a fun person to be with. You don't have a problem saying what I'm hearing you say is that you think I'm really smart and you love spending time with me flows very easily. But if you're saying you abandoned me, you left me stranded there. You don't pay attention to me. You don't really care about what I have. And I have to repeat that.

You know, you're such a fun person to be with. You don't have a problem saying what I'm hearing you say is that you think I'm really smart and you love spending time with me flows very easily. But if you're saying you abandoned me, you left me stranded there. You don't pay attention to me. You don't really care about what I have. And I have to repeat that.

And I don't see myself in anything that you've just said. That is really challenging. So what I'm hearing you say is that when I go to read my book, it leaves you feeling very left out. Is this it? Do I get it? Hmm. Yes. Tell me more. Well, because the last three times you went to read your book, you never came back down and you stayed there in your attic for three hours in a row.

And I don't see myself in anything that you've just said. That is really challenging. So what I'm hearing you say is that when I go to read my book, it leaves you feeling very left out. Is this it? Do I get it? Hmm. Yes. Tell me more. Well, because the last three times you went to read your book, you never came back down and you stayed there in your attic for three hours in a row.

And I don't see myself in anything that you've just said. That is really challenging. So what I'm hearing you say is that when I go to read my book, it leaves you feeling very left out. Is this it? Do I get it? Hmm. Yes. Tell me more. Well, because the last three times you went to read your book, you never came back down and you stayed there in your attic for three hours in a row.

And what am I supposed to do here? I thought we were going to do something together. It's Sunday. What I'm hearing you say is that I stayed very long. And I want to start to argue, no, it wasn't three hours. I never stayed three hours in my attic. It only was one hour. But instead, I have to say it felt to you or it was three hours.

And what am I supposed to do here? I thought we were going to do something together. It's Sunday. What I'm hearing you say is that I stayed very long. And I want to start to argue, no, it wasn't three hours. I never stayed three hours in my attic. It only was one hour. But instead, I have to say it felt to you or it was three hours.

And what am I supposed to do here? I thought we were going to do something together. It's Sunday. What I'm hearing you say is that I stayed very long. And I want to start to argue, no, it wasn't three hours. I never stayed three hours in my attic. It only was one hour. But instead, I have to say it felt to you or it was three hours.

You say it was three hours and that I completely let go of the plans that we were going to spend time together. And that ability to enter the view, the world, the inner world of the other. And still think, I'm only repeating. That doesn't mean I agree or I accept. That is not my experience of the same thing. But I can enter your world for a moment. That is the exercise.

You say it was three hours and that I completely let go of the plans that we were going to spend time together. And that ability to enter the view, the world, the inner world of the other. And still think, I'm only repeating. That doesn't mean I agree or I accept. That is not my experience of the same thing. But I can enter your world for a moment. That is the exercise.

You say it was three hours and that I completely let go of the plans that we were going to spend time together. And that ability to enter the view, the world, the inner world of the other. And still think, I'm only repeating. That doesn't mean I agree or I accept. That is not my experience of the same thing. But I can enter your world for a moment. That is the exercise.

Which one are you? Are you one of those?

Which one are you? Are you one of those?

Which one are you? Are you one of those?

Yeah. Are you one who says... Are you, actually, I could go with your question, but I have something I would love to describe.

Yeah. Are you one who says... Are you, actually, I could go with your question, but I have something I would love to describe.

Yeah. Are you one who says... Are you, actually, I could go with your question, but I have something I would love to describe.

No, because when I asked you, are you a person who stands your ground? Or are you a person who likes to be right or who needs to be right or who needs to be affirmed when you believe you are right? There are different variations here. Or are you a person who will you submit? You'll basically say, OK, you know, it doesn't really matter or whatever. you surrender, you let go, you release it.

No, because when I asked you, are you a person who stands your ground? Or are you a person who likes to be right or who needs to be right or who needs to be affirmed when you believe you are right? There are different variations here. Or are you a person who will you submit? You'll basically say, OK, you know, it doesn't really matter or whatever. you surrender, you let go, you release it.