Dr. Melanie Hayes
speaker
704 appearances
2 recordings
1 series
first heard Dec 2019
last heard Feb 2022
Dr. Melanie Hayes’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
You know, when they when they become twelve and thirteen and they hit that latent period where they're developing their friendship circle, their second family, a lot of our kids have never had a chance to do that.
And so those milestones, the developmental milestones that move them towards launching have not happened or happened much later.
So I think for parents, it's it's about reducing anxiety, about helping their children see where they're stressing.
Strengths are, helping them learn to self-advocate so that they can ask for what they need so the world doesn't seem quite as scary a place, to really stretch out the launching pad because the runway needs to be longer for our kids.
They might not launch till their mid to late 20s.
But once they launch, if the parents give them that sort of support and help them understand how to use their strengths to be functional in the world.
And how to use the advocacy for the places where they're not functional, then the world seems less scary and they feel more capable.
And, you know, parents I think
Oftentimes the sort of vicious circle is parents overcompensate because they they see the anxiety and they try to reduce the situations that create the anxiety.
And it's you know, good parenting, you're trying to protect your child, but it's a really fine line to walk.
So as you're raising your child, you want to push them, nudge them a little bit so that they see that they can tolerate a little distress, that they can
can, you know, be out in public and and go to this event and do it successfully or or they can
Um
uh finish this uh project and be able to to show it to people.
So um it's tricky, but if the parents can can do that little bit of dance where the kids learn to have confidence in themselves, because really it's kind of all about self-efficacy, self-advocacy, staying connected to your passions and really embracing yourself for who you are, that that's what the kids need.
need to launch.
And so give them time, give them space, and and help reduce the anxiety.
Like point out to them what they can do well.
Yeah, it's a major trust fall for parents, right?
But you know, I've I've done this long enough.
Showing 241–260 of 704 · page 13 of 36
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