Dr. Robyn Koslowitz

It's there.

Like, don't make me work so hard.

And yet we have to work so hard.

Otherwise we can't break cycles.

I think the first thing is, and we just said it, this idea of time travel to the future.

What do you want your kids to remember about their childhood or about you?

We call that the castle on the cloud from the Thoreau poem, right?

You should build castles in the cloud.

And then we have to build the staircase.

Okay, so how do we get there from here?

What staircase?

So if you want your kids to feel like they had a really functional, well-run home where things were stable and predictable, what are some elements of that kind of a home?

I had a post-traumatic parent come into me and she said, I grew up in absolute chaos.

My parents were completely dysfunctional.

We're talking like mold on the walls, empty fridge, multiple child protective services, visits, no routine medical care.

I do not know the first thing about running a home.

And now I'm pregnant.

I don't know what to do.

And the first thing we did was rather than be like, okay, let's start from the bottom up is we started from the castle.

So you want your kids, what do you want?