Dr. Ryan Martin

You know, you think to yourself, well, hey, for me to achieve X, I've got to get A, B, and C done this week. And it's impossible to get A, B, and C done in a single week. So you set yourself up for failure that way.

You know, you think to yourself, well, hey, for me to achieve X, I've got to get A, B, and C done this week. And it's impossible to get A, B, and C done in a single week. So you set yourself up for failure that way.

Oh, yeah. A lot of times I won't give things a lot of breathing room. Right. You know, and that kind of is a bummer. I know sometimes you'll have a meeting with a friend and you're like, oh, I wish this meeting could be another 45 minutes. But, you know, I only set up a certain amount of time because I'm too focused on the work aspect of it and not focused on like the human aspect of it.

Oh, yeah. A lot of times I won't give things a lot of breathing room. Right. You know, and that kind of is a bummer. I know sometimes you'll have a meeting with a friend and you're like, oh, I wish this meeting could be another 45 minutes. But, you know, I only set up a certain amount of time because I'm too focused on the work aspect of it and not focused on like the human aspect of it.

Oh, yeah. A lot of times I won't give things a lot of breathing room. Right. You know, and that kind of is a bummer. I know sometimes you'll have a meeting with a friend and you're like, oh, I wish this meeting could be another 45 minutes. But, you know, I only set up a certain amount of time because I'm too focused on the work aspect of it and not focused on like the human aspect of it.

Sometimes that happens.

Sometimes that happens.

Sometimes that happens.

I do this all the time. I set goals for myself. I do this every semester. Intentionally, I say, these are the things I want to do this semester, this year, whatever. And then what that translates into is, well, that means that this month I've got to get X, Y, and Z done. I've got to do these things. And then that means I overplan for a particular week or day, and then I get frustrated with myself.

I do this all the time. I set goals for myself. I do this every semester. Intentionally, I say, these are the things I want to do this semester, this year, whatever. And then what that translates into is, well, that means that this month I've got to get X, Y, and Z done. I've got to do these things. And then that means I overplan for a particular week or day, and then I get frustrated with myself.

I do this all the time. I set goals for myself. I do this every semester. Intentionally, I say, these are the things I want to do this semester, this year, whatever. And then what that translates into is, well, that means that this month I've got to get X, Y, and Z done. I've got to do these things. And then that means I overplan for a particular week or day, and then I get frustrated with myself.

And then it connects back to that core belief that you're talking about of, Well, I'm not good enough, right?

And then it connects back to that core belief that you're talking about of, Well, I'm not good enough, right?

And then it connects back to that core belief that you're talking about of, Well, I'm not good enough, right?

Or I ruin everything. I can't do this. What the F? You F, you loser.

Or I ruin everything. I can't do this. What the F? You F, you loser.

Or I ruin everything. I can't do this. What the F? You F, you loser.

Too often the solution to that is that we, instead of giving ourself grace and being patient with ourselves and saying, hey, we set impossible goals for ourself, is we just say, well, we just need to work harder.

Too often the solution to that is that we, instead of giving ourself grace and being patient with ourselves and saying, hey, we set impossible goals for ourself, is we just say, well, we just need to work harder.

Too often the solution to that is that we, instead of giving ourself grace and being patient with ourselves and saying, hey, we set impossible goals for ourself, is we just say, well, we just need to work harder.