Dr. Shadé Zahrai

We need to acknowledge that they were doing the best that they could with what they knew at the time.

We have this beautiful ability of taking ownership of our lives, which actually comes down to the third pillar, which we'll get to, which allows us to, as you said, become aware of these patterns.

So often, Jay, and if you're listening, you may find that you have not been aware of these things.

And it's only when you listen to sessions like this, conversations like this, when you read a book, will you suddenly start to almost self-diagnose and realize, uh-oh,

This is me.

See, that is a really positive thing because you're identifying that you are part of this experience as opposed to just this is who I am.

So that's a really positive thing.

So what do we do if we identify, okay, I'm really struggling with acceptance?

The very first thing is to acknowledge that you are not your thoughts and you are not your beliefs.

Beliefs are simply just a repeated pattern of thought that has happened so many times in our brain that it becomes a default.

It's just a really, really fast process, neural pathway.

And in the same way that a belief is formed early in our lives, we can overwrite that belief.

Yes, it takes time.

Yes, it takes repetition.

Yes, it takes practice.

But we have the ability to do that through conscious choice.

And so the moment you start noticing that you're feeling insecure, those thoughts come into your mind.

I can't do this.

I don't deserve this.

I'm not enough.