Drew Nickens

I get why kids bring them to school, dude.

Understand, I grew up in Los Angeles, California.

Me and my boys like to watch special Olympic highlights to feel better about ourselves.

And we were watching women's field hockey because feminism.

When he came in and he said, would you hit that?

And I said, I can't.

And it's because if you have sex with a special needs girl, sir, you will be looked at as a predator, as someone who's taking advantage of someone, and you need to do better.

If I have sex with a special needs girl, oh, Drew finally found love.

And I deserve to be canceled because I drive a car and I pay my bills.

I shouldn't be on a date with someone who needs a chaperone.

And my boy said, Drew, you're terrible with women.

You're like a shitty bowler.

You need to use the fucking bumpers because you may not be cool using bumpers, but at least you hit something.

I am one grilled cheese sandwich combo and a Wiggles concert away from getting the best sloppy toffee of my life.

Thank you all so much.

Drew Nickens.

It felt okay.

It felt a little tongue-tied at the end, but I'm getting my pacing down.

I'm not just yelling Reddit.

That's true.