Eric Schur

And I say, a bagel?

And he says, yeah, just hold on.

And the person at the counter says, would you like a toasted?

And Robert says, yeah, toasted.

Why not?

I say, I'll tell you why not.

So we wait for Robert's toasted bagel, and this entire time I'm like, I'm standing there, I'm tapping my foot, and Robert gets his toasted bagel and his coffee, walks over to the station where there's cream cheese and butter, he puts cream cheese and butter on it, and then he sits down at a table.

I'm like, why are you sitting down at a table?

He says, would you calm down?

We're fine.

I'm like, no, we're not fine.

Like, it's getting dangerously close to 7.20, and the plane takes off at 7.30, and the gate, like, we still have to go to the gate, which is far away.

I don't know if you know this part of the Portland airport, but it's like down a weird hall, and then down an escalator, and then there's a turn.

You know what I'm talking about?

And so I decide that whether Robert is ready or not, I am going.

I say, you can have your bagel.

You join me later.

I'm going to the gate.

And he says, fine.

And so I go down to the gate, like just power walking as fast as I can with my, you know, little roll-em suitcase.