Esther Perel

It's what can this partner bring to me rather than what are each other's needs that we can

cultivate together.

It's very different to say a we versus a you who is going to help me become more of myself and make me become the best version of myself.

You know, you live in a big world.

There's a lot of things to think about besides just me.

technologies, our predictive technologies are trying to remove all the inconveniences.

What they're trying to do is present you with a very polished life where there is no friction, no obstacles.

Nothing that you have to work through, which traditionally has always been seen as that which gives you a sense of resilience, that which gives you experience, that which is necessary for child development.

It's true for little kids as well.

They need friction.

They need to resolve problems.

They need to figure it out.

They need to make mistakes and correct it.

So do we.

So that's friction.

Besides that, I'm a sex therapist as well.

And there's a beautiful formula of Jack Maureen, a major sexologist, who that says attraction plus obstacle equals excitement or desire.

Obstacle is friction.

It makes me want more when I don't have and I have to reach out and I have to seduce and I have to be imaginative rather than it's right in my lap.

No, no, no, no.