Esther Perel

It's not just you put yourself out there.

It's that, of course, you come with your vulnerability.

If you're not vulnerable, you're probably not interested enough.

Just let's put that out.

Vulnerability is a sign that I care that something important is happening here.

I'm interested.

And now I'm not sure.

Are you interested too?

Are you interested as much as me?

Did you think about me as much as I thought about you?

You know, instead of wondering how many words shall I send before I show myself to be too needy and too dependent?

No.

No.

Every time I think about the list, the checklist, the boxes, I always think, do you put as much emphasis on who you want to be than who you want to find, right?

I mean, it's like, what is this?

This is the consumerism.

I come with my checklist.

I sit in front of you in a noisy bar and I'm going to ask my questions and see if you check my boxes.

That is such an awful experience.

And if you think that in the middle of that, you're going to get goosebumps or some butterflies in your belly, you're off the chart.