Esther Perel

We have many vocabularies.

Words is one.

And girls are often more trained to be in verbal vocabulary.

We talk, you know, partly because we've been taught to distrust our bodies.

So we became masters of talk intimacy.

But intimacy can be experienced in a lot of different ways that don't involve the only words.

And by the way, we talk with our bodies for 18 months before we utter the first word.

So our mother tongue is often physical.

Emotional intelligence and intellectual compatibility is different things.

You know, if it's very, very important for you to be with someone with whom you can have these meaty conversations, know that upfront.

Know that upfront.

If you say discussing how I should handle my mother is not something that I do talk about with my boyfriend because I don't think that his advice, then go to your girlfriends.

Do not think that one person can give you what an entire village should provide.

A boyfriend is wanting a boyfriend.

A girlfriend, if you're a girl, is wanting a girlfriend.

We need a community.

You need to diversify.

Better relationships, stronger relationships are often diversified.

You know exactly, when I have this kind of issue or this kind of interest, that's not where I go.

I have my friends with whom I share those things and I have my friends with whom I talk about those things.