Gemma Speck
speaker
6,373 appearances
17 recordings
1 series
first heard Jan 2026
last heard 13 Jun
Gemma Speck’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
Trend
recordings per month · last 12 monthsRecordings per month over the last 12 months — 17 in all, peaking in Jun 2026 with 4.
Appearances
I've been there.
I've done so many silly things for people who've never showed any interest in me.
And that is a problem and that does require some examination.
And this is when we need to break the spell.
Here's how I think we should go about it or you should go about it based on some of the psychological principles, the same psychological principles that got you hooked in the first place.
Identify firstly what it is about them that they represent that you think you are otherwise missing.
Unrequited love is rarely just about the person, it's about what they symbolize.
When you feel intensely drawn to somebody who doesn't want you back,
Your brain isn't just responding to them as an individual.
It's responding to what they represent in your psychological world that is absent.
This is a concept closely tied to Freud's concept of projection and idealization.
Again, as we said before, we take the qualities we admire, we crave, we feel we lack, and
We place them in this other person.
And in that way, we turn them into an emotional solution.
We turn them into like the golden bandaid.
Maybe what you're lacking and the reason you're attracted to this person is because you're not confident.
And this person is so confident.
So you feel like if they were to be with you, you'd finally feel good about yourself.
The thing is, if your self-esteem were to improve, if you were to realize how amazing you actually are, your need and desire for them, you would be surprised by how quickly it would disappear.
Maybe what you're lacking is a sense of security right now.
Showing 921–940 of 6,373 · page 47 of 319
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