Grace Kuhlenschmidt

every country on the list faces at least 10% tariffs. Even small, remote places like the Heard and McDonald Islands. They are near Antarctica and covered in glaciers, home to many penguins, but no people.

Because I'm a serious journalist, Michael. I wanted to embed myself with the locals to get the real story. And that's why I disguised myself as a penguin and learned their culture and made it with the hottest one.

Because I'm a serious journalist, Michael. I wanted to embed myself with the locals to get the real story. And that's why I disguised myself as a penguin and learned their culture and made it with the hottest one.

No, they don't all look alike, Jordan Klepper. Wait.

No, they don't all look alike, Jordan Klepper. Wait.

Well, at first I too thought that Trump putting tariffs on this uninhabited island was a sign that he had suffered brain damage. But after spending a week here in negative 11 degrees and drinking lots of seawater, I totally see where he's coming from. The penguins are taking total advantage of America. We buy all their skins to make tuxedos.

Well, at first I too thought that Trump putting tariffs on this uninhabited island was a sign that he had suffered brain damage. But after spending a week here in negative 11 degrees and drinking lots of seawater, I totally see where he's coming from. The penguins are taking total advantage of America. We buy all their skins to make tuxedos.

But have they ever... But have they ever bought any fish from us?

But have they ever... But have they ever bought any fish from us?

Yeah, but our fish comes in stick form. My grandfather was a fish stickerman. And these penguins are the reason he lost his job. Also, he got Me Too'd. Plus, America makes a lot of other things penguins don't buy. Soybeans, natural gas, grenade launchers.

Yeah, but our fish comes in stick form. My grandfather was a fish stickerman. And these penguins are the reason he lost his job. Also, he got Me Too'd. Plus, America makes a lot of other things penguins don't buy. Soybeans, natural gas, grenade launchers.

Oh, why? Because they're too stupid?

Oh, why? Because they're too stupid?

Well, they don't have thumbs while they're f***ing me either, but they're doing that perfectly fine.

Well, they don't have thumbs while they're f***ing me either, but they're doing that perfectly fine.

Husta, I have a family of penguins to look after. I'm a mother now. And, oops, they just got eaten by a seal. I'll be home tomorrow.

Husta, I have a family of penguins to look after. I'm a mother now. And, oops, they just got eaten by a seal. I'll be home tomorrow.

No one uses that word anymore.

No one uses that word anymore.

What would you call that kind of store? A grocery store. That word is so old. Not a single living person uses the word grocery stores, except for you.