Ian Smith

Boring!

I want to be young again.

I want to do fun things.

Just because I'm in my late 30s doesn't mean I can't go laser quest or go-karting.

So we are going go-karting.

So what you are about to listen to is two friends go-karting while simultaneously attempting to have a serious conversation with each other in a segment that Radio 4 bosses described as an audio recording nightmare.

And something that could sound, and this is a quote, truly terrible.

I met Stuart and we got the customary how was your journey chat out of the way right at the start, as is required when two men in their 30s meet each other.

Just a couple of guys catching up.

First up, like what happens during all good catch-ups with a friend, we had to have a safety briefing.

Any questions?

Yeah, no questions from me.

I was also excited to discover that we'd arrived at a go-karting track for the stars.

It's still good, though.

So after Take That, it was time to put that safety gear on.

It was time to put that safety gear on.

And this is where I was once again shamed for having a famously small head.

Oh, really?

Yep, so with my head, face and brain currently protected by Disney character design...

We hit the track to burn some rubber and have a proper catch-up, but I immediately realised the big problem with my plan.