James Sexton

We want to feel loved.

We want to be the best version of ourselves.

We want someone to see our blind spots.

All the things we know we want when we're looking for love, right?

We want to be someone's favorite person.

We want to have a favorite person and then get to be around them.

have a favorite cat it's lovely it's lovely to have a favorite person and you might be your cat's favorite person and what a lovely thing to be like to be someone's favorite it's lovely like it's a great sensation so you want to stay there now right that's what you want most okay so there's lots of things you might want right now but do you want them more than that because here's the thing like i don't if i'm going to be in a monogamous sexual relationship

I don't want it to be like I can suffer through this.

And I also don't believe that like, you know, I want to meet someone that's going to make me never want to sleep with anyone else ever again.

I'm going to meet a woman who makes me want to give up all the other ones forever, no matter what.

Okay, that's ridiculous.

What you want is you want someone who goes, yeah, there's always going to be beautiful other people.

Like, but what I want is like a deep connection to this person that gets deeper.

I'm going to trade novelty.

for deep connection, like deeper and deeper connection and trust and like real intimacy where like we really get to know each other and we really get to know what the other one likes.

And we make a priority of giving this person what they like and what feels good to them.

And they we know that they make a priority of our pleasure and our joy.

Like that's a practice.

That's a discipline.

You know, will there always be junk food?