Jennifer Selby Long
speaker
698 appearances
14 recordings
1 series
first heard Nov 2024
last heard May 2025
Jennifer Selby Long’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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right so if you sense that level of risk and you feel it's important to keep your job oh it pains me but you got to start documenting conversations agreements you got to document open items and follow up emails after conversations Try to have more group conversations.
Oh, God, I just want to gag when I say this, but look, if you objectively size it up as politically messy, start doing those basic defensive actions. And no matter what, you must maintain your composure in a politically messy situation, no matter how absurd it becomes. The most absurd one to date is one that happened to a client about 24 years ago.
He found himself receiving the wrong performance review from his general manager, who mixed him up with another direct report and launched into the review she'd prepared for the other man. Now, I will admit, these two gentlemen were both Scandinavian. They looked a lot alike, but come on, they weren't twins.
So he just maintained his composure, told her that the objectives she was covering were for the other man's projects. He also made sure he paid more attention to having accurate data about his performance in writing, which did prove to be helpful later. And please don't become ultra paranoid. Please don't stop trying to build a positive working relationship, even in this situation.
It is still good to try to build a positive working relationship. A couple more, consider multiple ways to deal with the situation, right? Is the ineffectiveness entrenched? Or is the boss just having a bumpy transition? Look at options like going out of your way to ensure that the team achieves its goals while the boss gets up to speed on new responsibilities.
Or if there's something that you recognize the boss is always going to be ineffective at this part. offer to help out in an area that your boss doesn't enjoy and doesn't do well. I had one client who's great at team building, initiated team building outing. This boss just isn't good at that.
I had another one who is great, has an eagle eye on a project plan, just offer to validate that project plan because she could see she's always going to be better at it than the boss. And then
honestly this one's a little touchy but honestly ask yourself is it that the boss is completely ineffective or are you resisting adapting to a change that the boss is implementing so gosh it's painful to admit right that it might be that the strategy is sound but you hate it or you just don't buy into the direction
And if that's the case, at least you're recognizing you're resisting adapting to this change. You don't want to go along with it. And so in that situation, you have a choice. You can either say, you know what, I'm going to voice my concerns and I'm going to commit to making it successful for as long as I'm here because that's my job. That's what I'm here to do, right?
Or you're going to decide from a healthier, more grounded place, this change just isn't for you and you are going to leave. And maybe that's when you are going to go to build that business, but you're going to do it in a way that is very positive and constructive for those people around you and for yourself.
Because you'll have made a more intentional, informed choice rather than a choice that's driven by unexamined and unconscious feelings. That's when you wind up just working for a different flavor of a bad boss. Does that help?
Absolutely. Politics can exist for a couple of different reasons. And I think it's important to recognize which of those situations you're in. So politics can exist for extremely unhealthy reasons in all seriousness, because you have a leader at the top, who quite literally has a personality disorder.
Now, people who suffer from that problem often aren't aware that they're suffering from it, but also do not respond to coaching. And the politics that they drive are from a whole different place. And it is going to be extremely difficult in that environment to manage your way through the politics and to drive change. And that is one whole animal that is
It is just beyond the scope, I think, of what we could cover in this particular episode of the podcast. But the other driver, which I find much, much more common, is that politics exists because people have different needs and because people have different skill levels. And so someone who is particularly good at recognizing the needs of the people who wield the most power
is going to be better at figuring out how to get those people on board with the change, right? And so it becomes, so again, it's so funny that politics triggers our saboteurs make us want to defend ourselves, right? They are all about survival. But in fact, we circle right back to empathy because being able to understand
and empathize the competing needs of the many stakeholders involved in a change is the path forward. It is the path forward. You cannot move through the creative process that you need to have to construct that change in such a way that it meets multiple needs. You will not, without empathy, be able to bring together leaders who need to come together and who don't especially want to.
So, that, again, is the foundation. Above and beyond that, multiple steps, and maybe that's the subject for another podcast, but you will want to defend yourself against politics, but...
Opening yourself up to really putting yourself in the shoes of all of these people who seem to have power that perhaps you think they don't deserve is the foundation to understanding what's going on and to being able to navigate or, as I like to think of it, surf your way through those political waves and those choppy waters.
I always say my practice and the focus of this coaching practice was not something that I determined. It found me. And by that, I became an accidental change manager in the early nineties when I was just Jennifer from the IT training department. And I would get contacted because someone would want some technical training. And the very first project that I did at this company.
I was so excited because they said they're not adopting storing their work on the servers and they need some training. So I showed up ready with my pencil sharpened and I was waiting to hear the process and the manager driving that project listed the first three steps, which I wrote down and then he stopped. because that was the whole process. Vincent was three steps long.
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