John Oliver

No, no, no. This administration is very proactive. Using genetic testing, they've already isolated two young children whom they think have the best chance of solving the global warming crisis. LAUGHTER Most likely through some kind of anti-global warming machine. An aerosol spray of some kind. Or a gel. Anyway, to keep them safe, they've been placed in a raft on stilts.

No, no, no. This administration is very proactive. Using genetic testing, they've already isolated two young children whom they think have the best chance of solving the global warming crisis. LAUGHTER Most likely through some kind of anti-global warming machine. An aerosol spray of some kind. Or a gel. Anyway, to keep them safe, they've been placed in a raft on stilts.

Given some science books, but no television. And they can't get off until one of them cracks this nut.

Given some science books, but no television. And they can't get off until one of them cracks this nut.

Oh, my money's on the kid with the bigger head. Between you and me, I think that other one is... unfrozen caveman food.

Oh, my money's on the kid with the bigger head. Between you and me, I think that other one is... unfrozen caveman food.

Oh, not at all, John. It's my privilege to be here. My executive privilege. I still got it. John, what a... What is executive privilege? Executive privilege is a special right of privacy asserted by presidents when they don't want you to hear about something bad they did.

Oh, not at all, John. It's my privilege to be here. My executive privilege. I still got it. John, what a... What is executive privilege? Executive privilege is a special right of privacy asserted by presidents when they don't want you to hear about something bad they did.

Oh, yes. It's similar to claiming the fifth or, in medieval times, tagging a priest and yelling, sanctuary. At that point, the priest was it.

Oh, yes. It's similar to claiming the fifth or, in medieval times, tagging a priest and yelling, sanctuary. At that point, the priest was it.

Well, think about it. How often will a president say, oh, my God, these memos prove I've behaved ethically throughout my term of office. Destroy them. No. Presidents invoke it in cases ranging from burglary to sex to racing dogs for money in the White House bowling alley.

Well, think about it. How often will a president say, oh, my God, these memos prove I've behaved ethically throughout my term of office. Destroy them. No. Presidents invoke it in cases ranging from burglary to sex to racing dogs for money in the White House bowling alley.

No, I'm not suggesting it. That would violate executive privilege. Instead, I'm showing you this photo. You know, what makes bowling alley dog racing so exciting is that their paws don't get any traction on the wax.

No, I'm not suggesting it. That would violate executive privilege. Instead, I'm showing you this photo. You know, what makes bowling alley dog racing so exciting is that their paws don't get any traction on the wax.

Yeah, and Pluto's a planet. It goes all the way back to our so-called first president, George Washington, who cited it regarding foreign policy. So did Thomas Jefferson regarding his love letters to Aaron Burr. James Garfield claimed executive privilege to keep doctors from removing the assassin's bullet that was lodged in his innards for four months. Funny story about Garfield.

Yeah, and Pluto's a planet. It goes all the way back to our so-called first president, George Washington, who cited it regarding foreign policy. So did Thomas Jefferson regarding his love letters to Aaron Burr. James Garfield claimed executive privilege to keep doctors from removing the assassin's bullet that was lodged in his innards for four months. Funny story about Garfield.

In the end, he died of sepsis. What, too soon? What? John.

In the end, he died of sepsis. What, too soon? What? John.

Fascinating. Did you know that Richard Nixon owned one of the first cell phones in the United States?

Fascinating. Did you know that Richard Nixon owned one of the first cell phones in the United States?