Jordan Klepper

This is what British people get for not seasoning their food, okay?

Food deserves better.

Frankly, I'm not convinced those French fries didn't just kill themselves.

So, sorry, Brits, maybe we're clogging our arteries with French fries, but you're clogging the chunnel with them.

And that, that is... Sonata Brava.

Guten Tag, Germany.

You think you're better than us because you have, what, accordions and giant pretzels?

It's not like you don't have your own weird shit going on.

Jesus Christ.

Cockroaches in the military?

Can you imagine?

Wait, so now instead of screaming when I see a cockroach, I have to say thank you for your service?

Let me guess, let me guess, they get to board the plane before everyone else too?

You know, if they get 10% off at Carvel, I'm gonna lose it.

But hey, as long as this isn't part of a larger trend in Germany.

Yes!

Germany is rebuilding its military for the first time since World War II.

And that's okay, because it's... Actually, maybe that is everyone's problem.

21, everyone.

When we come back, Andrew Jarecki will be joining me on the show.