Jordan Klepper

Like there's no like, I'm building strong bones.

I mean, that is maybe the whitest thing you've ever said.

The idea that someone bothered to make a no swimming sign.

To a degree.

I just don't know anyone who is just trying to pry people of swimming to the point where they just randomly put it up.

So then if someone was doing that and it was known, I'd be way more on your side.

I'd be like, yeah, you gotta check it.

But the fact that someone who's not here right now is like, nobody should swim in this.

Does orange mean have fun?

I mean, I'll throw this out there, because I don't go to the beach often, so I'm the wrong one to ask.

And when I go, I don't swim.

I just sort of stand there.

But any time there is not a lifeguard anywhere,

like at the beach or anything, I assume that they drowned.

Something happened to the lifeguard.

I don't go off like in my head like, oh, I guess the lifeguard's like on break.

I'm like the lifeguard clearly tried to save someone and this person fought them.

Because, you know, sometimes people fight you when you're trying to save them from drowning.

I always assume there needs to be a lifeguard that needs help.

I don't enjoy it.