Julia Dhar

And then you get by yourself for a second and you say, what is wrong with me?

Yeah, exactly.

And then you ask yourself, what is wrong with me?

And you say, well, I actually don't really know.

I don't have good explanations, but I know I don't want to be where I am.

So we have some good thoughts about why it might be the case.

A really important one is identity salience.

So we all wear so many hats, so many versions of ourselves.

We are different at work than we are at home.

We're different with some friends.

than we are others.

And you can think about these as not totally different people, but they're different versions of Julia, different versions of Gemma that people experience.

And that's normal.

It can be really healthy.

But often when we find ourselves in a situation or a relationship or an environment or a job, by the way, that we don't want to be in, it is because there is some part of our identity that is really important to us, even if we haven't

properly excavated or understood and make

If I became single, I don't know who I would be, for example.

Or I have only ever had this job, so it is impossible for me to imagine having another one.

So I can't quit.

So I stay trapped in a job that I know makes me unhappy, for example.