Julia Dhar

This always happens.

They're not respectful.

And we've jumped really fast to, they're not a good person.

They don't value our relationships.

Whereas, of course, in 100% of the situations where I have been late,

There's obviously a very good explanation.

Usually outside of myself.

The train was delayed.

Someone else really needed me.

Perhaps I was coming from a very important meeting.

And so that fundamental attribution error, the tendency to

externalize our own mistakes and to blame other people for their limitations is really dangerous because it not only prevents us taking a hard look at ourselves but also prevents us being more forgiving, more welcoming, maybe even more helpful to that person.

I do this all the time.

I'm hearing you say that.

I was like, oh, I did this this morning.

There was like somebody walking in front of me and I was like, that person is so rude.

I was like, can't they see that this is a busy sidewalk?

And then I literally did it like five minutes later.

And I was like, well, that's different because, you know, and then I was like, no, it's not different.

Like I had to pause in the middle of the street to text someone.