Laura Koonsberg

And bats are rarely on Snapchat, making it incredibly safe.

The wallpaper in my house is stuck to the wall with pesto.

Mr Speaker, why is the British government happy to get its oil and gas from Russia or Qatar, but not from Aberdeen?

Mr Speaker, if everything's so hunky-dory, why did half his defence team quit this week?

This is BBC Radio 4's Intrigue to Catch a King, the hit investigative podcast where we try to make every last second sound as dangerous and dramatic as possible.

I'm Sue Mitchell, I'm a reporter, and my friend Rob Laurie is ex-army.

LAUGHTER

But you forget how tense things are.

This week, we're in Calais.

As usual, Rob, his ex-army, goes off on his own and despite us having to be quiet all the time, he calls me on my phone.

Rob, his ex-army.

What is it, Rob?

Do you want a coffee?

Deep in the heart of Calais, Rob is in a Starbucks.

It's the break we needed, Sue.

Because of editing, I've immediately joined him.

There's eyes on us, Sue.

This is another dramatic thing Rob says a lot, because of the danger.

He says it whether it's CCTV, a tourist taking a selfie, or because there's a nearby person with eyes.

Run, Sue, run!