Lisa Lampanelli

Well, Allie's mom was just beautiful and sweet and smart.

And her brother and sister were there.

Now, her sister was a tad overweight.

Mm-mm.

And...

It looks as though Allie may have put on a couple of pounds over the course of the season.

Yeah.

There's trouble.

That corset means trouble.

And it's going to stay on through the whole scene, right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

chugging champagne and chugging cock for six months straight right punctuated by guys feeding her chocolate covered strawberries right what do you expect on the end of their dicks but it's weird because you think oh my god what a beautiful girl and maybe she's she's fighting that battle a little bit but then you see the sister and you think oh yeah she's a great big fat person

Yeah.

Well, congratulations to the happy couple.

Now, the two lead stories today, Adam, were incredibly depressing, and I didn't know what to do.

All right.

I can't do both of them because it's just all going to be too dark.

Well, here's the thing.

I am going to play depressing story roulette.