Menu
Sign In Search Podcasts Libraries Charts People & Topics Add Podcast API Blog Pricing
Podcast Image

Adam Carolla Show

Harland Williams + Lisa Lampanelli (Carolla Classics)

12 Jun 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?

1.769 - 46.706

Salkku X. We meet again. Five numbers. Five wishes. Estimates. Conclusions. Power. As a reward, the X-Pen G6 electric car is completely yours. 10 weeks to solve the code in the address power.fi.x. Don't miss it. Welcome to Corolla Classics. I'm your host, superfan Giovanni.

0

46.726 - 61.442

This is the podcast where we play the best moments, highlights, and fan-selected clips from all 17 years of The Adam Corolla Show. If you'd like to access the ad-free archives of The Adam Corolla Show, as well as the archives of The Adam Dr. Drew Show, and the new podcast, Beat It Out, make sure to check out Adam Corolla's Substack, adamcorolla.substack.com.

0

61.49 - 77.877

And if you'd like to request a clip, please email us, classics at adamcarolla.com. We can only play material from all 17 years of the Adam Carolla Show podcast. We cannot play any of the material that aired from 2006 to 2009 on KLSX, nor can we play anything from Loveline. If you have any questions or want more information about those shows, I remastered them as well.

0

78.077 - 98.449

Please check out my Patreon, patreon.com slash Giovanni. Now on to the clips. Coming up first today, we have Adam Carolla Show 376. This one's from 2010. It's after the format switch. It's 44 episodes into the new format, mimicking the old radio show format from 2006 to 2009. Teresa Strasser's on news, Brian Bishop on sound effects. Classic episode. Hope you guys enjoy.

0

102.547 - 131.068

Podcasting isn't just about talking, it's about growing, engaging, and monetizing, and that's where Podcast One Pro comes in. Whether you're an independent creator or a major brand, Podcast One Pro gives you the tools you need to take your podcast to the next level. We're talking about premium hosting, advanced analytics, dynamic ad integration, and expert distribution. We're talking about

131.048 - 161.978

all designed to maximize your reach and revenue. Plus, with access to Podcast One's industry-leading network, you'll be connected to top-tier advertisers and a massive audience. It's time to go pro and turn your passion into profit. Visit podcastonepro.com to get started today. Podcast One Pro, the power behind the podcast. At first, I didn't think it was real.

162.619 - 172.974

I woke up to this blinding light, and I was transported to another place. Pluto TV! Then I heard a voice. Come with me if you want to live.

172.994 - 178.662 Ralphie May

There were thousands of movies and shows, and they were all free! The truth is ours. It's just so beautiful!

179.243 - 196.068

On Pluto TV, free streaming of Terminator 2, Fringe, Arrow, The 100, and The X-Files. May cause excitement, loss of sleep, and sudden belief in extraterrestrials. No credit cards or alien encounters necessary. Pluto TV. Stream now. Pay never. Good day, Bald Brian. This is damn exciting stuff. Good day, Teresa Strasser.

Chapter 2: How does the podcast highlight the transition to a new format?

265.694 - 293.011

And their graduates have gone on to win Emmys and Grammys and Oscars. Oh, my. So you want to get in touch with these folks and you want to check them out. And, again, we always talk about this. F that junior college or just, oh, I'm taking – Taking art history at Santa Monica City, whatever. Just specialize in something. You can be well-rounded later.

0

293.312 - 295.717 Lisa Lampanelli

Yeah, this is the time to make a living.

0

296.158 - 302.291

Yes, you can be the guy from the Dos Equis commercial later on in life. He has some gray in his beard.

0

302.752 - 303.413 Ralphie May

Yes.

0

303.494 - 332.409

Right now, let's make some bucks. Check them out at 888-590-8824. That's 888-590-8824. Or you can go to pinnaclecollege.edu. And by the way, the phone number is toll free. All right, let me talk about me for a minute. For minutes. Let me talk about me for an hour. Only a minute? Yeah. A couple interesting things happened today.

332.449 - 336.673

I had a nice long sit-down with Kenny Burns, you know, the documentarian.

336.794 - 337.214 Lisa Lampanelli

Oh, yeah.

337.795 - 357.237

Interesting cat, man. Sat down, talked to that cat for an hour. It was like, really, it's like I just blinked my eyes. Not on the phone. You were together. Former Ace Award winner for best interview, I believe. Best guest. Best guest or something, yeah. He pointed that out to me. Of course, I didn't remember. Oh, he was amazing. I was like, is sure Al Gore didn't win that year? What a guy.

357.338 - 359.741 Lisa Lampanelli

Well, Ken was in studio, so he had an advantage.

Chapter 3: What insights are shared about the challenges of parenting?

2780.912 - 2808.968

It's a Citrix-based company, so it's brought to you by Citrix, so you know it's a name you can trust. GoToMyPC.com, a 45-day free trial for my listeners only. GoToMyPC.com. Use the promo code ADAM. 45 days free trial. You can hook up two computers. You can have your home computer and your work computer. Access for free from any other computer. 45 days. Promo code ADAM.

0

2809.249 - 2811.797

Lisa Lampanelli, great to see you, beautiful.

0

2813.043 - 2815.967 Lisa Lampanelli

Lisa, you look amazing. Congratulations on your wedding.

0

2815.987 - 2817.53

Thank you. How's the marriage of Big Lou?

0

2818.892 - 2822.117 Ralphie May

It's Jimmy Big Balls right over there. Oh, Jimmy Big Balls. That's right.

2822.137 - 2823.258

He's still got the big balls.

2823.919 - 2826.864 Ralphie May

Is your mic on? Can I hear you? I hear myself.

2826.884 - 2830.269

Oh, okay. Dawson's shaking his head no.

2830.409 - 2834.235 Ralphie May

Uh-oh. Uh-oh. I'll turn it on for you. Let's make sure we're turned on.

Chapter 4: What relationship advice is given to a college student?

3867.603 - 3870.747 Harland Williams

I love your show. It's great. Teresa, Brian, I love it every day.

0

3870.787 - 3872.53

Thanks, Nick. What's up?

0

3872.55 - 3878.257 Teresa Strasser

Wrong! You actually really stole my thunder, because I'm an 18-year-old in a relationship, actually.

0

3878.758 - 3882.203

And your hormones are going nuts, and you're all caught up in everything.

0

3882.763 - 3891.375 Teresa Strasser

And what's up? Yeah, everything's actually been going good. My question was, I'm going off to college in a few weeks, and my girlfriend, she's actually got me in high school.

3891.743 - 3896.768 Harland Williams

And, you know, a lot of people have been giving me crap because I'm going to be staying with her, you know, while I'm away at college.

3896.788 - 3900.592 Teresa Strasser

I mean, because, you know, I mean, I know that this isn't going to last forever, but I really like her.

3900.632 - 3903.195

You're staying with her while you're off at college?

3903.776 - 3904.096 Teresa Strasser

Yeah.

Chapter 5: How do comedians view long-distance relationships?

3904.516 - 3905.197

How's that work?

0

3905.978 - 3915.088 Teresa Strasser

Well, I mean, I'm only like six hours away. I mean, we text and we got video chat. I'll come back in like Thanksgiving or so.

0

3915.188 - 3917.43

I mean, you're staying together with her.

0

3917.933 - 3919.976 Lisa Lampanelli

It's going to be a long-distance relationship.

0

3920.918 - 3938.507

The problem with that is you're going to see tons of hot broads in college. That's what I hear, yeah. Yeah, and they'll want you that much more because you'll go, I got a girl back in my hometown. I'm texting her right now. Yeah, yeah. So the question is, should you stay?

3938.977 - 3943.526 Harland Williams

Yeah, like, I don't know, maybe advice, because I'm pretty sure I'm going to stay together with her.

3943.967 - 3962.656

Yeah, but you don't really think you're going to make it through four years of college, or in your case, nine years of college with her. Nick, okay, here's what I would... I just really want to enjoy the ride. Well, here's what I would do. I wouldn't say I'm dumping you and I'm going off to college. I would just go off to college. See how it goes.

3962.736 - 3976.971

And if some really smart, cute chick who sits behind you in your chem lab just fucking presents herself to you and you just hit it off and you're both going and she invites you to go to the sock hop or whatever the hell you do in college, then don't fight it.

Chapter 6: What insights do comedians share about fame and relationships?

3977.332 - 3994.36

You know what I mean? Let nature sort of take its course. Don't go to college going, I'm definitely not going to break up with my girlfriend. And don't go to college going, I'm definitely going to meet someone in the first semester. Just go to college and see what happens. Brian? I will say, too, as I remember, Teresa, back me up.

0

3995.021 - 4003.616

There's no greater blizzard of hookup activity in the first couple weeks of freshman year. Because everyone's getting to know each other. Everyone's new. You're all excited to be there from other places.

0

4003.756 - 4004.337 Lisa Lampanelli

Drinking.

0
0

4004.999 - 4011.46 Lisa Lampanelli

But I like your advice. Just take it day by day and don't be tormented about what to do. You stay with her until it doesn't work anymore.

4011.921 - 4037.804

Then you move on. All right. We got a long distance now. We'll go to two. Hey, Kurt. Kurt's taking a break in the middle of a relationship, wants to know if it's healthy. Normally, not. Sometimes it works. In my situation, in my case, it did work. But most of the time, when you say to your partner, let's take a break, it's for a reason.

4037.904 - 4046.413 Lisa Lampanelli

Now, by the way, Lisa, I don't know if you're aware of this, but Adam's now married. Yes, I did. And they've been married for 12, together 12 years or something?

4046.433 - 4047.274

Between 6 and 10 years.

4047.414 - 4049.376 Lisa Lampanelli

And at what point did you take a break?

Chapter 7: What is the significance of the black mask in the crime discussion?

7884.516 - 7890.335 Ralphie May

But he carried them out as a black man. He used a black mask to try to get away with this.

0

7890.395 - 7894.648

Well, if he had a mask on, what if it was a black guy wearing a black mask?

0

7895.219 - 7899.684 Lisa Lampanelli

How do we know it wasn't... Because he is a white guy.

0

7899.724 - 7909.335

But what if he just did the black thing? He's going, I'm a black guy. I'll wear a black mask and throw them off, but they already have the guy, so there goes my stupid theory.

0

7909.615 - 7919.807 Ralphie May

But isn't that funny? This black mask is really interesting, and he thought... It's great. It maintains all the prejudices of... Why did he have to do a black mask?

Chapter 8: How do comedians approach sensitive topics like race in their humor?

7919.827 - 7921.569 Ralphie May

He couldn't have done an Asian mask?

0

7921.849 - 7923.471 Teresa Strasser

If I was Bill Cosby, I'd be pissed. What?

0

7923.653 - 7944.398

But see, that's the thing with society now. They think everything's got to have a racist link. Okay, think about it. If you're a white guy and you want to create a diversion... Why not go to the complete opposite of what you are? So if you're a white guy, dress as a black guy to throw them off. If you're a black guy, go as a white guy to throw them off.

0

7944.458 - 7956.521

But it doesn't necessarily have to be like a racist thing because black people and white people rob banks. So I just had to clear that up because I'm getting emotional. I might need a WikiLeaks diaper. Sorry.

0

7957.363 - 7958.326 Lisa Lampanelli

No, I'm feeling your pain.

7958.647 - 7958.867

Thank you.

7958.887 - 7964.882 Ralphie May

But it was a, for anyone who wants to buy this, it's supposedly, it's a silicon, silicon, not Silicon Valley, silicone mask.

7964.902 - 7965.905

It's a NASA mask.

7965.925 - 7972.74 Ralphie May

It's a purchase from a California costume company. And it behaves like real flesh and muscle. It's amazing. Isn't that interesting?

Comments

There are no comments yet.

Please log in to write the first comment.