Matt Abrahams

You can get it wherever you get your books. Really trying to help people hone and develop their communication and improve their careers.

Hala, thank you. This was a true delight. You are a master at what you do.

Hala, thank you. This was a true delight. You are a master at what you do.

Hala, thank you. This was a true delight. You are a master at what you do.

Hala, thank you. This was a true delight. You are a master at what you do.

Hala, thank you. This was a true delight. You are a master at what you do.

It boils down to two things. It boils down to mindset and messaging. So we have to get our mindset and approach aligned with our goals of speaking in the moment. So first, we have to manage anxiety. Anxiety looms large in all communication, but especially in spontaneous speaking. And then we have to reframe how we see this. First and foremost, the goal we have.

It boils down to two things. It boils down to mindset and messaging. So we have to get our mindset and approach aligned with our goals of speaking in the moment. So first, we have to manage anxiety. Anxiety looms large in all communication, but especially in spontaneous speaking. And then we have to reframe how we see this. First and foremost, the goal we have.

Many of us, when we're put on the spot, we want to do our work. job right. We want to give the best answer. We want to give great feedback. We want to be the most interesting person in small talk. And that puts a tremendous amount of pressure on ourselves and makes it actually less likely we will achieve those goals. So we have to switch from perfection to connection. Just have the goal be

Many of us, when we're put on the spot, we want to do our work. job right. We want to give the best answer. We want to give great feedback. We want to be the most interesting person in small talk. And that puts a tremendous amount of pressure on ourselves and makes it actually less likely we will achieve those goals. So we have to switch from perfection to connection. Just have the goal be

connecting and conveying the information you need rather than doing it right. And by the way, there is no right way to communicate. The second thing we have to reframe is the whole interaction. Many of us see these spontaneous speaking situations as threatening, as something we have to defend against. When somebody asks us a question, we feel challenged.

connecting and conveying the information you need rather than doing it right. And by the way, there is no right way to communicate. The second thing we have to reframe is the whole interaction. Many of us see these spontaneous speaking situations as threatening, as something we have to defend against. When somebody asks us a question, we feel challenged.

When somebody asks for feedback, we feel put on the spot. And yet we need to reframe those as opportunities. It's an

When somebody asks for feedback, we feel put on the spot. And yet we need to reframe those as opportunities. It's an

love it okay how do you get out of a conversation that you don't want to be in yes so that can be very challenging and small talk is one of these things where we often find ourselves in conversations that we don't want to be part of and and we need to get out of them so i on my podcast think fast talk smart had the pleasure of interviewing someone named rachel greenwald rachel is fascinating she is an academic and a professional matchmaker and she has wonderful advice

love it okay how do you get out of a conversation that you don't want to be in yes so that can be very challenging and small talk is one of these things where we often find ourselves in conversations that we don't want to be part of and and we need to get out of them so i on my podcast think fast talk smart had the pleasure of interviewing someone named rachel greenwald rachel is fascinating she is an academic and a professional matchmaker and she has wonderful advice

And she taught me what I call or what she calls and what I use is the white flag approach. And it doesn't mean surrender. It doesn't mean you're in a situation, a conversation you don't want to be in and you surrender. Rather, in auto racing, they signal the last lap by waving the white flag. It tells all the drivers that we're about to end the race.

And she taught me what I call or what she calls and what I use is the white flag approach. And it doesn't mean surrender. It doesn't mean you're in a situation, a conversation you don't want to be in and you surrender. Rather, in auto racing, they signal the last lap by waving the white flag. It tells all the drivers that we're about to end the race.

In conversation, you can exit politely by simply waving the white flag. Simply say, in a few minutes, I want to go talk to somebody over there. But before I go and you ask another question or you share some information with them about something they said. So you continue the conversation just a little bit longer and then you excuse yourself.

In conversation, you can exit politely by simply waving the white flag. Simply say, in a few minutes, I want to go talk to somebody over there. But before I go and you ask another question or you share some information with them about something they said. So you continue the conversation just a little bit longer and then you excuse yourself.